Some of you may have read my post about my mil the other day. I haven't seen her since and can't imagine i'm going to for a while as she's made of feel so bad about myself that the thought of seeing her gives me panic attacks. I'm happy not seeing her but I hate seeing hubby so down. He says he won't see her until I do (even though i've said its fine if he does) and has a lot of issues with his mum but I know he hates this. I know its partly because his now going to have to sort things out and he'd rather bury his head in the sand but I can't help feeling i'm happy at his expense. His mum isn't helping as he asked for some space and she's bombarding him with texts every day. I just can't see any way out of this though

Aw I didn't see your post on mil but mine isn't great so I feel for you. I would happily cut mil out as she ignores me to the point of just being rude I.e asking oh if he wants biscuits but not offering me or our kids just one example.

Hopefully oh will face issues with his mum. I hope it gets resolved in a way that works for all of you.

Hugs

X

Well I did an unbelievable thing tonight - I apologised to my MIL

I didnt even mean to it just came out! Like you I havent saw MIL for a week & was bloody tempted not to go tonight but decided to swallow it for Caitlin. Before leaving Stuart begged me not to row with his mum and put things behind me/forget about last week (wanted to smack him for that but anyway).

Walked in tonight and she said hi to Caitlin and then I just thought - *$%£ it, I dont want it to be awkward, I'l never feel close to her so I may aswell play this whole fake/nodding game she likes and accept that I cant change her. So I said I was sorry if id annoyed her in anyway, that wasnt my intention and I just wanted to sort things out with Stuart myself. She then apologised and gave me a hug . I then left lol to give my friend a lift to town. Still not keen on hanging round her but at least Caitlin got to stay for an hr and have some nana/caitlin time.

I do feel better now the air is cleared a bit (even though I had to do it!), Im the more mature person, it was done on my terms and though I was a wimp and didnt say my true feelings towards her I think iv reached a place were Iv accepted she is an arse and am not going to get upset by her again - remind me I said this in 6 months time when im ranting again lol!

I do feel better now with Stuart as we can sort things out without either of us bringing his mum up. That was a seperate issue and now its closed.

If I was you I dont think the feeling of panic/dread would go away until I saw MIL again - be it to apologise, talk, ignore what happened, shout.... Id need something to happen. I guess no one can decide what is right for you. My MIL isnt a risk to Caitlin, just an interfering biddy so I suppose there are different issues going on. Dont feel guilty - especially if your MIL doesnt! Maybe your OH needs to sort things out on his own with MIL before you and her try and repair any bridges. Maybe an underlying issue is she feels you have taken her son away?

Glad you've sorted things with your mil. Don't think it has anything to do with oh because she wasn't bothered before Jamie and if oh's brothers have kids she won't care about Jamie. Think I need to take some time out for my health at the moment. Hubby has been out with my sister's husband and my dad and seems happier. They both had problems with their mums so hopefully its helped to talk to them. My sister also pointed out i'm not stopping oh seeing his mum so I shouldn't feel guilty because his chosen not to