I've been thinking about the child my parents fostered, she had serious attachment issues (that was the main reason my parents didn't adopt her - my mum had said from the start she could cope with most issues but not attachment ones)

The social workers never once 'labeled' her as having these issues, but now looking back I can see everything about how she was came from lack of attachment as a baby, so because they didn't 'admit' she had these issues they were never dealt with - it was impossible to parent her tbh, I think only a specialist who knew all about it would stand any chance.

This explains it quite well What is Reactive Attachment Disorder?

Anyway the first 2 years of a childs life is where the 'attachment' process takes place - so the first 2 years of your childs life are so important in shaping how they grow up.

The little girl was 6 I think when she was removed from her 'parents' - so you can imagine how damaged she was after that length of time!

Do you think there should be more early tests to check that parents are actually parenting their child? I saw a TV program that tested the relationship between child & mother, it was very simple but the results were so obvious.
It seems that all the HVs are interested in is whether they are fed/growing etc (not blaming HV's as its not currently their standard role) ... not that they are emotionally developing.

I think their should be compulsory checks done - 6 months, 1 year and 2 years - to stop so many children being emotionally neglected (and worse)...it should never get to 6 years before its realised that these children are not being parented.

Im undecided on this one. I totally agree 6 is too late when it comes to trying to place 'damaged' (though I hate that term) children.

Obviously the pro's are it would tackle poor parenting issues earlier on, and perhaps by offering parents more support on the 1st year less children would end up being removed.
If the emotional neglect was so apparent earlier on then I suppose adoption in theory could occur at a younger age. In my area it can take an average of 12 months to place a child who has been freed for adoption, baring in mind the child may be 6 months before referred to SW very few adoptions take place below the age of 3 (by which stage the child will have been in foster placements, made attachments that will be broken again).

The bit that worrys me, and the bit that makes me think routine assessments for emotional neglect at that age wont work is the fact that many disorders like autism, aspergers etc cant be diagnosed until 2-5 years of age and in infants may show similar signs to that of emotional neglect. It would be very hard to judge between the two and it would be awful if children were later discovered to be on the autistic spectrum and had been removed from loving homes. I think the routine tests would require specialist training and wouldnt really be black and white enough. Maybe they could be used as a flaging system to refer more children to Social services I suppose and it could be taken from there...

It probably wont happen anyway due to lack of funding. My HV assessed Caitlin at 4months and she doesnt get another review until she is 4 at her school readiness assessment. Thats fine for me, but I do worry about other children who apart from 12 month jabs (5min appointment) are left unobserved for 3 years.

I think thats the scary thing - Izzy hasn't been seen other than when i have taken her for jabs - she is over 2 now so really anything could have happened!

very interesting reading. I totally agree with these findings and most of it it common sense. On the flipside though, there must be thousands of deprived children in this country whose parents fit the description of not satisfying the childs needs because of poverty, alcohol use or even having this very disorder themselves - very scary !!!

These children are our future and it saddens me that thousands of children are not getting the basic emotional care and nurturing, these poor kids will grow up to be insecure, unmotivated and wont fit in with "normal" society.

I read alot of Tracy Hoggs books when Cerys was born and she has the same insight as these findings. Her book was my bible and her advice and case studies gave me the knowledge to bring up Cerys in the best possible and most healthy way. Its this lack of knowledge, education and support for modern day parents that are contributing to this unfortunate situation. Without being judgemental on parents today, the future just doesnt look promising for kids today xx