I'm really scared and losing sleep over this. In an ideal world I go into labour early morning on a weekday we drop Rowan off at nursery we phone my mum she makes her way down. Rowan can stay at nursery until 6:30pm. In my head I have the baby in the afternoon whilst Rowan is at nursery. Trev picks my mum and Rowan up at 6:30 takes them home and comes back to see me and baby where hopfully we can go home.

There is no way this will happen. What if I'm middle of the night then what?))) we don't know anyone here I'd have to go to
Hospital on my own whilst Trev looked after Rowan.

I don't want a home birth the floors and Walls here are THIN and I could distress Rowan if he saw me in that pain.

Or I last until at least 39'weeks when my mum comes down to stay until I have baby.

Or I ask my brother to come and stay from 35'weeks even though he does my head in.

I'm so concered about Rowan being safe and looked after that I'm dreading the whole labour.

I need a plan of action but I don't know what and it's really upsetting me now to where I can't stop crying ( stupid hormones)

What would you do?

I know these things have a habit of doing your nut, but then just kinda working out!

I do agree though until you have a plan in your head you wont settle... is that why you up this late chick?

How far away is your mum? If you are sure you are starting then if it were me I'd call my mum as soon as I thought I was...chances are she'd get there in time but I dont know how far away she lives

I dnt know what your bro is like but having mine come stay would prob cause me to go into labour...... n I ain't pregnant! X

My mum is in Essex which would take her about 2.5 hours to get to me depending on the time too if it's middle of night then she'd not be able to get here.

My brother does my head in but he's really good with Rowan and has seen Rowan more than my mum has. We see my mum next weekend so Rowan has a reminder of her (he's not seen her since nov)

I wake up alot especially recently thinking about it.

I think he best option would be to have my brother here I really don't want him here as he's a pain in the arse but then I think I want o enjoy my mat leave (I have 4 weeks on my own before due date) arghh I'm so confushed

awww hun, this is the one thing thats causing me sleepless nights too.

right is there any banda ladies that you would like to have him around you that could have rowan till your mom gets there...

also as my darling sil (love her really, except this bit)keeps informing me that the second is always quicker, just because hers was doesnt mean i will be going from 24hrs to 3 hrs... but anyway that is a possiblity, so you dont want to be hanging around waiting for family to arrive.


i can see that your brother is a pest but what about having him come to stay from 37 weeks, so its not as long.

but dont worry about it, i know its easy to say, but as lisa said these things work out, but its also nice to have a clear plan
sending a hug, not sure if i've helped or made it worse xx

i would definitely go with getting your brother down - it will be horrible for you, but hopefully the peace of mind will be enough to get you through!

Aww hun I am worrying about exactly the same thing. We don't even have Imogen at a nursery so don't have that option. I'm trying not to worry about it by thinking normally labour, even second takes a few hours so my plan is the first min I think I'm going into labour, I'm calling my sis, my mum (but she's off on holiday till few days after baby is due!), my aunty, matt's mum &dad, friends. I'm thinking out of all of those people one of them will be able to get to ours before we absolutely have to get to hospital.

Try not to let it worry you too much, these things all work in the end xx

Arrh hun ur right to sort a plan out coz u never can predict when baby is going to come unless ur contractions start. I would have ur bro over it will give u a peace of mind if it come too it.

Char

i spoke to Trev this morning about it and for once he listened and didnt dismiss me.

he has suggested his work college Will. he's such a nice man and his wife is lovely and their 19 daughter works in a nursery too.

so trevs going to find out if they'll be our back up if we need them

Hopefully trevs colleague will agree, can't see anyone refusing to help out. What are your neighbours like?
Hope this all gets sorted soon xx

also I like clares idea of any local banda ladies helping out. If I lived near you I would help

Oh thast good Kell, I know your bro would mean to help, but I know how much he does your nut! SO Trevs friends daughter sounds ideal!

i hope he says yes!

am sure he will i hope any way.

i mentioned my brother to trev and he said no. last time he was here i almost punched him in the face, which is not like me at all. but trev agreed he took the piss and if i wernt pg would have been calmer.

i just hope it all happens when my mum is down already which from end of june.

Can seee wh yyour feeling stressed x
Hopefully Trevours friend will do it x

Kelly I dont mind being a back up. I can be at your house within 30 mins and either stay there until your mum gets there or he can even come and stay with me until you get home if you dont want to rush your mum here. If everything goes well with the labour they send you home really quickly at Frimley and discharge 24 hrs a day, so you wont be away from him long. I really would be happy to help and you can phone me anytime day or night x

thank you Mandy.

I would really appreciate that if you don't mind. Rowan knows you and thats my concern too. him being with someone that he does not know.

It's weird cos I don't know how it works if that makes sense. I never had to worry about anyone else last time.

Right, I worried about this and my family are all pretty close.

But, I can say that it will work out.

Lets face it, as much as we would all love to go into labour and pop the little things out fast... it rarely happens... and there is a lot of waiting around, puffing and panting, etc. before bubs will make an appearance.

I think if you are going to pop in the night, then you would likely go into labour earlier on in the evening, giving your mum a chance to get there. If you are going to pop in the day, then chances are, you will get niggles during the night and you can tell your mum to make her way first thing.

So, worst case scenario... you have super duper fast labour... get in the car, with Rowan, and go to the hospital, your OH can hang around with him and then im sure there are plenty of nurses who would happily play with Rowan on and off until your mum gets to you.

x

no problem hun, my mobile is on 24/7 anyway and we'll spend some time together when you finish for mat leave so you're comfortable that he's ok with me. Rowan and Chloe will have a great time x

Thanks Mandy. Been so busy at work having to train my replacement (4th one)

Laura my concern is mainly I think because I got to 7-8cm before I was in any form of pain from my labour with Rowan. I just didn't feel anything and I'm scared it will happen this time and there won't be much time left for my mum to get here.

As much as I'd love the same labour it scares me

I had the same worry, having had a quick labour first time, plus snowy weather this time. In the end I decided I was in labour around 8pm and OH found a retired neighbour who came round at midnight and went to sleep in our bed (hence if it was a false alarm we had nowhere to sleep), with Seb's breakfast and clothes all set out. We left at 1:40am and OH was home by 6am so when the neighbour woke up he went home again and Seb never saw him.