I am quick chilled (well I think) Im not one who wont let them play outside in the mud, I think the dirtier they get the better. Lillies stinking 1/2 the time. Im not one who always saying 'becareful' Im quite the opposit (maybe too much lol) but I just think if she hurts herself she wont do it again. Dont worry I wont let her run off into the road and get run over!! and think well she wont do it again

When I take her to the soft play area or park Im the one who watches not running behind them helping them making sure they dont hurt. (maybe I am a bad mum )
When we go to the soft play I just let her go, 1/2 the time I lose her, but as long as I know she cant get out, Im quite chilled letting her climb up to the top and do what ever. where as I watch some mums screaming 'get down' and taking their shoes off to get up there with them.

I def had the chilled out approach. xxx

I'd loved to be chilled but I'm not hehe I'm the mum at the soft play who's chasing ellie everywhere (taking my shoes off so I climb up after her). But in other ways I'm chilled as in I'll let her playout in the rain/mud. Also I don't stress over what they eat. I try to give them healthy food but they also get chippy and take away if that's what suits me. As long as they're all safe and happy then I'm happy too

i have a heightened parenting style, but thats due to rich's conditions, i have to monitor him all the time or rather i did, because of his no sense of danger or poor social skills, hes often get hurt, but with russ i've learned to relax more. i'm overprotective and i know i am and i let him do things but then sit watch and freak out, but he doesnt know.

i'd imagine with this one i'll be more relaxed.

i'm also really hard on him, but have had to be, because he can spiral out of control so quick if i dont and then its hard to stop.

i over praise too, which is one way to help his conditions, but if my neices come, one gets told off they all do, because we can never tell who started it lol

I'm quite strict and firm. There are somethings on which I will have NO messing such as sleeping and stopping when I ask. I love for her to be involved in everything and encourage helping. I'm a little cautious such as I will be in the soft play with her and if she climbs the slide I stand with her but I always want to show her she can do/try anything.

I am ashamed to say I have a finely tuned "off switch" which means I don't hear whinging. I think I developed it whilst working with children. I'm very tuned into her emotions but fake whinging, I just zone it out and it doesn't bother me at all

I'm pretty chilled out in that i would rather Tyler learn from his own mistakes rather than warning him before... like if I take him to the beach he always wants to run straight for the sea. My oh will try and stop him whereas I just let him (Im obviously with him!) and I know full well that as soon as his feet get wet he'll hate it - he doesn't go back after that.

and Ive learnt to relax more about what Tyler eats and things like that but then I am strict with his routine, he goes to bed at 7 thats it no nonsense, I don't tolerate nonsence lol

Like LisaG I zone out tylers whinging and ignore it but my OH gets really stressed out by it... obviously Tyler whinges less for me because of it and plays my OH up!

hmmm in theory i would love to be a relaxed chilled out mummy but in reality i think i am a bit of a stresser i am trying to chillax a bit though and let elijah do what he wants (within reason ) and also be proactive, so he has decided he hates brekkie - we are just giving him different things to try for a bit (yogurt, fruit etc). i think some people would see that as giving in but i think its alright to be flexible?!

i probably will let elijah get away with stuff more than i should though, i dont want to but i see it coming! i cant bare the whhhiiiiiinnnnneeeee it really drives me crazy - i have been walking 3-5 hours a day with him to escape it but that can't go on forever

I think I am fairly chilled out, I like to stand back and let her make her own mistakes.

We are chilled with times but we do have a consistent routine and have approximate times when things should be done by.

When we go to spft play, I do like to get in with her and climb about, not so much because I am worried about her, more coz I'm a big kid and love love love it! But also, I like to be with her at first to give her confidence to do things and then once she has mastered it, I stand back. Was very proud of her yesterday as she climbed across a cargo net to the slide without me for the first time there ever!

With food, always been fairly chilled out about it, sometimes she eats lots, sometimes she eats very little, but i just take it as her telling me she is hungry or not. We have meals at the same time as each other and always have done and likewise have always eaten the same things, none of this preparing three meals to suit all tastes malarky.

With discipline, I do have some boundaries, like not hitting my face and not hitting out or throwing things in anger but other than that fairly relaxed I think.But Dave has a different sttitude and just play hits back so mixed messages on that one.

But yeah, generally fairly chilled.

Mandy xx

im not really sure, i guess im kind of in the middle.

my children go to bed between 6:30pm and 7pm, i hate hate hate them play fighting so thats a no no even if their cousin is doing it right infront of them, i dont let them join in, i see no good coming out of it. I hate kids who climb all over sofas so thats a no no, they know what they are and are not supposed to touch, they say please and thank you all the time and i hate shouting.
but, saying that i am more then happy for braden to go off and play in soft play, although that only has been very recently, after we nearly had a heart attack at monkey bizness loosing braden for 5 minutes lol.
dita i wouldnt let wander off tho.
i dont mind them getting muddy thats fine. I let braden walk slightly ahead o me aslong as there is no road close by, i dont mind him trying to climb trees etc.
their diet is quite relaxed, they have plenty o fruit and veg, good home cooked meals, still think raisins are sweeties but then we also have kfc, pizza and the odd chinese.
I will not let them even try fizzy pop until they are at least 5/6 hopefully older. my neice was drinking a can of pop, she is 5, the other day and i thought it was disgusting.
I'd like to think i am somewhere in the middle!
x

I am coaching Wil rather than bringing him up conventionally.

I answer every question with a question - 'what you doing?' gets 'what do you think I am doing?' By doing this Wil has to think for himself rather than relying on others to tell him things.

I am very relaxed and let Wil do his own thing within his boundaries but the second he hits a boundary I issue very firm warnings followed by meaningful consequences for repeating the behaviour. The boundaries are minimal and are only there to protect his safety and my sanity.

Wil is very much encouraged to be independent and stretch himself. He is given opportunites to try new things as often as possible. He is offered the same respect and courtesy I would give an adult and I explain myself to him rather than just tell him what to do.

hmmm suppose im somewhere in the middle really

he has a set bedtime at 7pm, and we stick to it...thats one iv always liked to stick to! i let him learn things for himself too!
as for the play area thing, im usually the one following every step behind, but only because like mandy im a big kid myself plus i just love watching them play im oit amazes me im a soppy bugger,although i dont usually interfere just stand back and watch...but if i go with friends i let him get on with it(although must admit im usually itching to go watch and take pics )
they both know their boundries and i stick to them when they try to push them, but i am quite chilled out most of the time(i think)
i try to explain things to them rather than just telling them no, i remember i always respected my mum much more as she used to explain why, where as my dad used to just say 'because i said so' and when i did something wrong my mum would talk to me about it...which i try to do instead of shouting straigh away! x

Id say I follow a lot of Gills approach. I am very honest with C and if she asks a question i never fluff over the answer ( we covered childbirth in a very minimal fashion last night) and i also never patronise her, if she asks me somethig i explain it and also try and get her to think it through. Im also very pro independence and she is encouraged to think of her own solutions and have a go at things plus if she asks a question i talk it through to get her to reason thigs through, I guess i speak to her in quite an adult fashion at times but since i can hold a full converstion with her and have been able to for sometime its never been something i have considered

Id like to say im chilled but i guess i can be a bit stressy at times though i used to be more relaxed and am hoping to get back to that once the newborn malarkey is gone and i have more time on my hands. Im not bothered about dirty play etc and am the fun one who chases her, paints with her etc but i am pretty also firm on her boundaries and routine and teaching her things like road sense and manners. So i manage to be the fun guy and the disciplinarian i hope ive struck a balance

GillandWil wrote:

I am coaching Wil rather than bringing him up conventionally.

I answer every question with a question - 'what you doing?' gets 'what do you think I am doing?' By doing this Wil has to think for himself rather than relying on others to tell him things.

I am very relaxed and let Wil do his own thing within his boundaries but the second he hits a boundary I issue very firm warnings followed by meaningful consequences for repeating the behaviour. The boundaries are minimal and are only there to protect his safety and my sanity.

Wil is very much encouraged to be independent and stretch himself. He is given opportunites to try new things as often as possible. He is offered the same respect and courtesy I would give an adult and I explain myself to him rather than just tell him what to do.

That is exactly what I do, and most of the time she knows the answer!

I am pretty strict I think, if she goes up to bed then she stays there, and that applies to all things really.

Like yesterday Dan gave Izzy the bubbles (what a stupid thing to do, I always blow them for her!) anyway she went into full meltdown at the table and threw her dinner on the floor and was screaming for her bubbles that I had taken away.

Dan came in and said I should let her go and play as she clearly wasn't going to calm down!

Yeh right Dan and have her learn that she can do that to get her own way! Umm how about no!

She say there for another few minutes shouting and banging and crying...and than calmed down and had some food...it wasn't hers as that was on the floor, she had 'Mummy Toast' (bagel lol)

So yeh I stick to my guns, as I can't bear kids that get their own way by making big fuss!

Lol yesterday we started her using a big girl beaker and she went nuts cos i was trying to control it to stop her tipping it before it got to her lips and no explanation would persuade her she was wrong, so i let her do wht she wanted....she ate dinner naked

OMG sounds like Izzy!

After I threw the bubbles away she got them out of the bin Anyway she kept holding the wand too close to her mouth...and NO way was she going to let me show her how to do it...she didnt seem bothered about the lack of actual bubbles and sat on the chair outside quite happily for ages!

Yup C wont let me teach her how to steer her scooter so ive left her ploughing into trees til she gets it. I think ive gone too far with encouraging independence. And possibly on the honesty too when i told her my best friend was going to have a baby and she pointed and said Out BitsnBobs

C and Izzy sound like Imogen, girl won't let me teach her anything, she's all about doing it herself.

I'm fairly chilled, i let her run away and do her thing. I hate when oh's family hover over her at the park cause you know she might possibly die coming down the 1metre slide!! Soft play i go with her for a bit, only cause i kinda love her excitement in those places. Imogen is so independent at times and i do love that about and encourage it. I find myself treating her as if she were older sometimes as i don't like to patronise her and will talk to her and explain things to her as if she were older.

When it comes to bad behaviour tho i can be pretty firm. I won't have her screaming and having a tantrum just to get what she wants.

I'm very relaxed with Rowan. At soft play he's off on his own OH and I now will get a good seat and watch him have his fun. OH likes to go in with him to play too though.

I'm very different to my family. Rowan does everything (within reason) himself he can now dress himself and undress himself. My mum says I talk to him like An adult and I should talk to him like a child but I will teach him my way. He's not able to ask full questions yet but can ask basic things like what is that and like gill I ask him what he thinks it is. I've only just realised I do this. Things like solving puzzles etc he does himself if. He can not fit a price I talk to him and ask him what would happen if he turns it round. Rowan fell out my mums patio doors the weekend whilst holding a football. Now he went head first but landed on the ball so didn't hurt himself my mum and sister jumped up and I had to shout leave him 3 times. He got up and carried on playing. Then his finger got shut in the play house door. He cried and my mum picked him up said oh it's ok you poor baby. This made me angry as he's not a baby I took him off her asked him to show me what was wrong he showed me his finger and I said oh your fine go play.'whilst I'm talking to Rowan ingot my mum behind me telling MW tomrun his finger under the tap she'll get the cream and a flannel. Once Rowan went off I told her he's fine stop fussing.

Rowan goes to sleep on his own when I say he might cry and ask memo lay with him but I tell him no. And he's always asleep within 5 mins max. I didn't agree with what my mum and sister did the weekend my 2 year old nephew is rocked to sleep in her or my mums arms then put to bed. My 5 month old nephew was starting to fall asleep on his own in his bouncer chair to which my mum shouted Charlotte he's falling asleep to which my sister replied quick bounce him so he goes. Sorry but wtf

i wouldn't say I have a particular style but i'm relaxing now she's getting older. i suppose I coach too without realising, Ava's very bright but also very independant and hates you doing things for her.

I am very strict with bedtime, 1830 and she goes and stays, i don't have a set time for day naps but just judge when she's tired, she usually has tantrums when she goes down but I walk away from it, my Oh gives into her a lot more than me.

i used to be very strict with food but now have loosened the reins a bit, If we eat out i'll give her a bit of pizza or a few chips at the seaside. I still wouldn't give her any soft drinks just water.

Umm... i think im relaxed in some things but strict in another.

Alfie is still a baby and cant talk and doesnt really understand much but im always teaching him to say "ta" or "tahnk you" or "please" when he gives me something or vise versa.I hate bad table manners so if he strops at the table or throws food etc he gets wrong. I try to explain to him that wat he is doing is naughty and why it is naughty. Hes just going through a phase of hitting me in the face and gets told off for it because i hate it. I always say "No alfie that is very naughty to hit mammy because you will hurt mammy and make her cry" and then i pretend to be upset which he hates and gets upset at himself!! Ih he does something wrong he knows because i say "No Alfie - naughty" and he knows it naught cos he has a little hissy fit. Another thing im quite strict on is bed times. Once he goesd upstairs at 6.45 he doesnt come ou of his room till morning no matter wat. I dont let him sleep in bed with us - never have done. In fact the only time he has done was when we were on holiday and there was no room for his cot. He alwsy has bath, bottle bed. From the minute he is put in his cotm he rolls over and goes staright to sleep and is there until morning. Igf he wakes early he doesnt come out of his room until 7am. I know straight away when hes poorly cos his sleeping is affected immediately.

However, im quite realxed when letting him do things himself. He likes climbing up the stairs atm and can do by himself. My mam tells me to put a stair gate on but im happy for him to climb the stairs as long as im there. I jst follow behind him just to be there in case he falls but my mam runs after him and takes him away into another room and shuts the door. I dont mind him getting dirty and play with water, sand, paints and gets messy with food. He has a relaxed diet too. He has plenty of home cooked meals and often eats the same as us but a couple of times a week he might have fish fingers, chicken nuggets, pizza etc. He has had a couple of happy meals and im not against giving him choc (maybe a couple of buttons once a week). But he has plenty of fruit, snacks on raisins like theres no tomorrow, loves grapes, breadsticks, cheese. He drinks loads of water in the house but if were out and about he may have a fruit shoot - i dont like the idea of giving him fizzy drinks tho for allllllooong time yet!

x

Think im somewhere in the middle i wouldnt say im too strict but naps, meals and dinners i like routine.
As for playing i do let callum get on with it altho im not too far behind him x