I know someone who took there life, and its always played on my mind.

Many people i speak to about this, says its selfish, the people that do it, dont think about who they leave behind

NO way is it selfish - it takes guts for someone to do that, of course they care about there loveds ones, but they think they would be better off without them

it really upsets me to think, someone could feel that low, that all they can see is one way out

some believe if you commint suicide you go to hell,

I'd like to believe, if they couldnt find the help they needed here, Then they will recieve it in the spirit world

I have very mixed feelings on suicide, so much so that i don't actually think I can say exactly how I feel about it or a person who does it.

All I know is me as a person right now I could never ever even think about doing it in any way - so how can I understand/sympathise/judge someone who has got to that point?!

Its a hard one x
i could never even think about it now but when i was a teen i took an overdose at 13 my mum found me and took me to hosp. i was very depressed didnt have a good upbringing due to myself my parents were going through devorce my mum met some1 else who i couldnt stand at the time he is now my stepdad and hes more like my dad now. I was feeling no1 would care if i was gone i didnt think about peoples feelings i was very naive x


I wouldnt say its selfish as such some people generally believe its not worth living they have nothing to live for where other situation is selfish they leave there loved ones to deal with it. xx

i dont think it is a selfish act, someone who is at that point of desperation isnt thinking rationally.

I had a friend who took his life last year and no one knows why either

At first I was really angry at him how DARE he do such a stupid thing and some times I am still angry at him for what he did.. but I also can't imagine how low and bad he must have felt to have done it.

I think suicide is selfish BUT the person who commits or attempts it isn't in their right mind anyway and so can't think of other people if you get me?

I tend to agree with what you said at the end there Jade.
It is selfish leaving your loved ones with that about of heartache, but the person who does it/attempts it isn't in their right mind, they can't think properly about others &their feelings and i feel for anyone that is low enough to consider it.
I've tried to commit suicide twice. Both times as i was so low i just thought people would be glad to be rid of me. Looking back i realise how much hurt i did cause my family and how much more hurt it would have caused if i actually died.

This is going to be a bit controversal but i find people who throw themselves infront of trains a bit more selfish as it causes so much havoc and also distress for the people who have to watch. My friend witnessed a woman throw herself infront of a train (the woman survived but had her legs chopped off) and my friend was stuck on the platform for ages and had to see this woman with severed legs be taken away by ambulance and it really distressed her. She said she couldn't sleep without seeing it all for ages. Obviously i feel for the woman, but my friend didn't need that she was only 16 at the time. It's kind a hard thing to deal with and she didn't even know the woman.

I agree Shell there is a degree of sefishness when they involve others physically and mentally like in front of trains and cars, and when thy ring for help the ambulance people - all of these people are effected by it and its not fair

If they are going to do it then they should involve no one else

My step dad committed suicide; he was a selfish, abusive pig and he threatened my mum that if she ever left him he would kill himself. Well she couldn't take the abuse anymore and she took us all to my nannas - the next day my stepdads work friend found him dead in the car with a hosepipe in the exhaust. It was a selfish thing to do, as my mum blamed herself, my sister (his daughter) thought she wasn't enough for him to stick around for, and the work friend who found him had to go through counselling....

I'm sorry if it upsets people but it is a selfish thing to do when you have people who rely on you and love you, yes my mum was angry at him but it doesn't mean to say they couldn't have sorted things out so that he could still see us kids and they still get on etc. He had grandkids to think of too but he didn't!!

OH's maternal grandfather took is own life in 1955 when MIL was 11. As a result she was packed off to a very harsh boarding school for 'orphans' and it destroyed her.

As a result MIL is incapable of showing affection, will not get excited about anything in case it is taken away and falls apart if her very strict routine is upset.

She has passed her 'issues' on to her children and they are now passing them on to their children.

I blame her father for a lot of this (not all as her mother also had a hand in it) and since his suicide was the catalyst and 55 years later people are still suffering I hate him for what he did.

my wee cousin hung him self in may. i firmly believe that if he got the help he needed after he quit the army he wouldnt have been in the mind frame he was stuck in. his nightmares were shocking. he couldnt get certain events out his mind/head/dreams. after his tours he was never the same. he was in the Royal Scot Dragoon Guards. "the green men got him"

it is selfish in part yes. when u think its ur only way out, u cant see that.

im gonna tell u a wee something. i hope im not judged on it.

after a very horrid time in my life when i was 19, i was almost very successful in killing my self. and still suffer the consequences of my actions, medically, to this day. i did know who i was leaving behind but i firmly believed who i was leaving was better off without me. iv thought about it on several occasions since and i have planned it twice in great detail and tried again once, shortly after i had alasdair. at the time i never knew it was my tablets making me feel that way..... being in a slightly better place, after loads of help im able to rationalise my thoughts and my oh sees the triggers coming and notices the changes and is able to prevent it 99% of the time.

story over....

i wouldnt say it takes guts. its not a brave step. not in my personal opinion. its an irrational thought in an emotionally heightened mind that leads to devastating actions.

i agree i think suicide is selfish but someone commiting suicicde is not purpousley acting selfish. you must be in such a dark place to feel that is your only way out and i really do feel for these people...but also for the peopel they leave behind...my auntie has tried to commit suicide on many occasions, and being a single mum has left my cousine from as young as 2 having to sit by her bedside in hospital wondering wether her mum will live or not this along with many other things has left my cousine very scarred x

It's very selfish...as death is hardest on the living. To leave loved ones behind with so many unanswered questions and deep heartache. Most every person hits a dark time in their lives and have considered doing it just to stop the pain, but pull themselves out of it..with therapy..medication etc. Everyone that I know that has taken their own lives have completely and utterly destroyed the people who loved them. Unless you are completely oblivious or under the influence there is no excuse to do this. Sorry I sound so harsh on this topic...but having to help pick up broken pieces for family and friends of those who have off'd themselves..and watching my MIL beg to live as Cancer devastated her body...leaves me a little less compassionate for those that do this to themselves. xxx

my big brother commited suicide when he was 19 ,, i was 12
my dad did what he does best concentrated on engines unable to deal with it and i sat with my mother watching any mother bury their own child is wrong
i think my brother was highly selfish ,, he left the house that night saying mum will you put a couple beers in the fridge for me for when i get back ,, he was not drinking that night he was in his car
left was a piece of cardboard with no reasons just a shed load of heartache

i thinks its horrible when people throw themselves infront of moving vehicles etc cos i've seen it happen before and the person driving the bus (in this case) killed himself too because he killed this person who threw themselves infront of it and couldnt live with the fact he had killed somebody.
Suicide tho i am not sure if its selfish, its an awful feeling and thought, and generally is a very thought out action, even tho the mind is not stable its generally not done on a whim
x

I think like with anything else in life, it's different for different people.

My Dad killed himself 6 years ago , I honestly thought my heart was going to break but he was a very troubled man. I dont however, believe he did this as a selfish act. In fact I believe it was quite the opposite and believe he did it partly to 'free' the rest of us.

How he didn't wasn't a cry for help (it wasn't an overdose that could be caught in time or anything like that), he never threatened to do it or anything like that.

My Dad was very loving and loved his kids and grandkids to bits, but his depression and personal problems eventually ground him down to the point where he thought we would all be better off without him.

xx

I have mixed feelings. I think its shelfish but also think it takes guts to do that and if someone is that low then they cannot carry on with life then they have the right do do it if thats what they want.
My dads best mate comited suicide but it was only a cry for help. He never meant to actually kill himself x

My Mum killed herself nearly 10 years ago and I am still grieving.
Since she died I have been in a deep depression and been very close to death myself - through OD,self harm etc...
I still hate the fact that she put us into care and chose her boyfriends and husbands over us but I know that she killed herself as she felt she had no other choice.
I suppose though being similar to my mum and having mental health issues myself I am more understanding of what she went through.
I agree with Michelle too. I think that suicide can be selfish but it depends how you do it. My mum did it at home alone - although my stepdad found her struggling and went to the pub while she was dying
Doing it in public I think is wrong.
When I was at my lowest I begged a stranger in town to push me off the bridge onto a busy main road and I got arrested and cautioned for it, too bloody right! I think that was when I tried it indoors on my own.
I suppose that you can call suicide selfish but when people are trying to take their lives they are so lost and confused that they don't really know what is happening, they are so focused on death.

To commit suicide a person must be so depressed etc that I don't think they do it selfishly they are ill and feel there is no way out. I have been to many suicides and read suicide letters left and it's heartbreaking how these people feel, sometimes being let down by family, doctors etc they feel this is the only way out. What really makes me angry are the people who ring Police/Ambulance every week saying they have taken an overdose etc just for attention seeking. X

I used to be a self harmer still am and have also considered suicide in the past. I don't think suicide is the cowards way out as some people say. It takes a lot of courage to do something so final, I think I never went the full way because I wasn't brave enough to do it. When you feel so low you honestly believe that everyone will be better off without you and you think you are sparing them pain by putting an end to your own.

When someone is suffering with severe depression..mental illness..its the disease that is to blame for them passing. Suicide for any other reason is such a waste of life.. When I remember a few ppl that killed themselves over a bad break up or not having enough money to make a car payment.. that just makes me so angry and sick!