For the last 4 months ellie refuses to be fed from a spoon unless it's strawberry fromage fraise.

So for her meals I give her pieces if food which she can feed herself with ie veggies, small pieces of meat, Cheese, friut, bread etc etc. Ellie does make an awful mess, which really doesn't bother me as it's quickly cleaned up afterwards. It's not that she has trouble getting it in her mouth it's that when she's full, fed up or doesn't like, she drops it in the floor.

I back to work last week and mil has her on Mondays. Today oh went to see her and she asked him where I get all my silly ideas from about blw etc. She said that by now (ellie was 1 last week) she should be using a spoon to feed herself and that if I wasn't capable of doing it then she would!! I'm fecking fuming! Oh just thinks it's funny and that his mother bonkers but I'm quite offended!

So at what age did your lo feed her/himself?

erm. I honestly cant remember. but I dont think you have anything to worry about! tell your mil not to feed her as how will she learn to use a spoon if someones always going to be doing it for her?
whats the harm in her using her fingers and eating and exploring in her own way? shes one year old. if she were a lot older then maybe you should worry a bit!

x

Amelia refused to allow me to feed her at all so I had to make sure she could pick up her food from about 10 months. She would, like Ellie, let me feed her a yogurt but then stopped letting me. She started to use a spoon to feed herself a little after her 1st birthday.

Cerys still has no intention of using a spoon/fork even though she has one to hold at each meal. She prefers to shovel her food in with her hands x

Your MIL doesnt know everything and should keep her 'silly' comments to herself!

There is NO reason why she can't carry on eating with her hands for much much longer!

Izzy wasn't BLW as such, but she learnt to eat with her hands early on, she eats 90% of her lunches and dinners herself, occasionally with a fork but not very often as she is better with her hands

She very rarely uses a spoon, simply cos she turns it to the way it fits in her mouth - upside down! So its a messy slow process and annoying for her too.

......Eating with properly a spoon at 12 months There aren't many that do!

Don't feel bad..Maky refuses to tip her sippy cup to get the juice out..we do it for her..but she has no problem drinking from juice boxes with the straws! She does try to feed herself with her spoon and baby fork..but still makes a giant mess. xxx

OMG hun - I would be offended/fuming too - how dare she!

Thomas was/is still exactly the same? I'm not sure how 'normal' he is coz we have had major struggles with his diet and eating habits since 10 months old but he has only been spoon feeding himself for about 6-8 weeks now and he is 2 in December so I think it is a little way off for Ellie yet bless her. Personally I would tell MIL to fluff off and allow her to be a baby. Babies are messy but it's all part of the fun and more importantly - the learning process. Give her a spoon/fork with each meal and let her experiment and watch you and she will pick it up in her own time. OH may think it's funny but he really should have a word with his mum coz if she starts to try to force Ellie into things too early it could leave you with major problems later on.

I really hope you can get through to her hun - you have every right to be offended - you are her mum not MIL!

xx

She's only started to spoon feed herself all the time within the last month - and she's just coming up to 20 months.

She has one 'snack' type meal a day and one hot meal a day, which she can either eat with her hands or cutlery. To be honest she was always quite lazy and was quite happy to let us spoon feed her, which we carried on doing, but she's recently started nursery and they make them feed the hot meals to themselves and don't allow them to use fingers, and since being there she quite happily does it at home too and shouts at us if we interfere.

My LO has only recently in the past couple of months started using a spoon to feed himself cereal, yogurts etc.

I always offer cutlery and he'll use a fork for a bit but if he thinks he can get further using his fingers then he does, geez I know 2 and 3 yr olds that still choose to eat with their fingers, god me and OH do

My LO went through the exact same phase of refusing anything off a spoon from me, I used to do the pre-loaded spoon, but again he soon got bored
Take no notice hun, you do it your way..she's your child

Gloworm wrote:

She's only started to spoon feed herself all the time within the last month - and she's just coming up to 20 months.

She has one 'snack' type meal a day and one hot meal a day, which she can either eat with her hands or cutlery. To be honest she was always quite lazy and was quite happy to let us spoon feed her, which we carried on doing, but she's recently started nursery and they make them feed the hot meals to themselves and don't allow them to use fingers, and since being there she quite happily does it at home too and shouts at us if we interfere.

really? they dont allow them to use fingers..so force them to use a fork/spoon? That is shocking, I wouldnt use that nursery

Girls, thanks for your comments, I do feel better knowing that ellie isn't the only one who prefers to use her fingers. I have tried a spoon and although she knows what to do she never quite gets it in her mouth.

xxx

I didnt know a nursery could do that. its not something you ask is it? "soo.. will you allow my child to eat with their fingers?"

amelie uses a fork but i still feed her yogurts with a spoon as she also turns it upside down wehn putting it her mouth lol.. but eats perfect with a fork

Lisa wrote:

Gloworm wrote:

She's only started to spoon feed herself all the time within the last month - and she's just coming up to 20 months.

She has one 'snack' type meal a day and one hot meal a day, which she can either eat with her hands or cutlery. To be honest she was always quite lazy and was quite happy to let us spoon feed her, which we carried on doing, but she's recently started nursery and they make them feed the hot meals to themselves and don't allow them to use fingers, and since being there she quite happily does it at home too and shouts at us if we interfere.

really? they dont allow them to use fingers..so force them to use a fork/spoon? That is shocking, I wouldnt use that nursery

My thoughts exactly Lisa I personally think it's dodgy to try to 'force' anything on a toddler, from experience it can lead to untold problems in the future (my personal experience not my LOs). My nan tried to 'force' certain things on me as a toddler/child and still to this day (at 29 years of age) I have 'issues' in certain departments .

xx

Lisa wrote:

Gloworm wrote:

She's only started to spoon feed herself all the time within the last month - and she's just coming up to 20 months.

She has one 'snack' type meal a day and one hot meal a day, which she can either eat with her hands or cutlery. To be honest she was always quite lazy and was quite happy to let us spoon feed her, which we carried on doing, but she's recently started nursery and they make them feed the hot meals to themselves and don't allow them to use fingers, and since being there she quite happily does it at home too and shouts at us if we interfere.

really? they dont allow them to use fingers..so force them to use a fork/spoon? That is shocking, I wouldnt use that nursery

Well maybe me saying they don't allow it is a bit extreme, it's probably more like encourage them to use a spoon, rather than fingers. I had a visit over lunchtime and saw what went on and wouldn't send my child to anywhere where she'd be 'forced' into anything.

I just think its wrong for a nursery to 'teach' a toddler anything like that - its the parents choice how and when its done, if I found out nursery did that with Izzy I'd remove her straight away! (I know they don't though!)

I have no experience, but like you say Debs some toddlers don't take to being made o do things before they are ready at all.

I don't really get how them stop them using their fingers

Gloworm wrote:

Lisa wrote:

Gloworm wrote:

She's only started to spoon feed herself all the time within the last month - and she's just coming up to 20 months.

She has one 'snack' type meal a day and one hot meal a day, which she can either eat with her hands or cutlery. To be honest she was always quite lazy and was quite happy to let us spoon feed her, which we carried on doing, but she's recently started nursery and they make them feed the hot meals to themselves and don't allow them to use fingers, and since being there she quite happily does it at home too and shouts at us if we interfere.

really? they dont allow them to use fingers..so force them to use a fork/spoon? That is shocking, I wouldnt use that nursery

Well maybe me saying they don't allow it is a bit extreme, it's probably more like encourage them to use a spoon, rather than fingers. I had a visit over lunchtime and saw what went on and wouldn't send my child to anywhere where she'd be 'forced' into anything.

ahhh I see, yes big difference between encouraging one thing and 'not allowing' the other thing

I had the opposite problem with Aron he refused to eat finger foods! Everything had go on a fork or a spoon! Even now he doesn't really like to eat stuff that's not on a fork/spoon! For example if he is eating a sausage sarnie and the sausage falls out he has to have a fork to stab it with and eat it seperatly!

Can't actually remember how old Jake was when he started to use spoon etc!!

Xx

I cant get callum to use spoon or cutlery x
i give him a spoon and he just chews on it or if i put food on it he tips it off and continues biting the spoon xx

Robert uses his fingers if i do give him a spoon he thinks its a toy and just bangs it on his tray!