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pinkyd
Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : durham Posts : 3931
| Subject: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 5:24 am | |
| with it being ava's first christmas , my OH wants it to be just the three of us.
Im fine not seeing his side of the family because they never bother with us anyway but i feel awful for my mum and dad, my brother lives away and we have no other family round here so they would be on their own all day. I know they'd be really upset if we didn't go to theirs because we always have but i do fancy a break from the norm.
i suggested i cooked lunch and they come here but OH says then he would have to invite all his rabble and i really cant do it, it would spoil my day completely.
anyone been in a similar situation? |
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kenty
Age : 39 Join date : 2010-08-24 Location : Leeds Posts : 2260
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 5:28 am | |
| every christmas me and sam have to divide our attention between our two families(mine in kent, his in merseyside and us in west yorks!) so it would be nice to hae just one day as our own lil family but it's 'expected' we see them all what about letting your oh have the xmas day just the three of you and then go and spend the whole of boxing day with them and make that like a 'mini' xmas day with a big meal and gifts?? have you spoken to your mum and dad? you neer know, they might welcome the idea of a quiet xmas day on their own? |
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*ShevAndLissieLou*
Age : 36 Join date : 2010-08-31 Location : North Yorkshire Posts : 1771
About Me! My Name: Status: Mummy Number of Children: 1
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 5:36 am | |
| I think what Kenty has just suggested would be a good idea if its a possibility. We have moved away from home and the last 2 years we have gone home for Christmas and it has been so stressful packing the car with presents and being away from our own home. This year though OH is on call over Christmas, so we will be staying at home and having Christmas Lunch for two hehe! xx |
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LisaAdmin
Age : 44 Join date : 2010-08-15 Location : Shropshire Posts : 8964
About Me! My Name: Lisa Status: Mummy Number of Children: 1
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 5:44 am | |
| we have this every year - and before Izzy came along we would both go to our separate families for lunch and then have evening together or something Of course now everyone wants to see Izzy on xmas day - so last year was very busy.
Dan's Dad is again trying to convince us to travel to Sweden for xmas...its NOT happening!
This year I think we are going to my parents for lunch ( I think its their turn to cook anyway as we do alternated years) then go to Dans mums in the evening |
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GuestGuest
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 6:46 am | |
| This year we're seeing ohs family in the morning and then meeting my parents in a restaurant for lunch.
But boxing day is ours! We're not leaving the house and having meat butties for lunch and watching christmas telly..... Perfect! |
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xx maxi xx
Age : 39 Join date : 2010-09-07 Location : home Posts : 242
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 7:14 am | |
| Now we have jamie we decided last year we would have christmas dinner together just the 3 of us, and visit oh mum and dad before dinner for a bit (they only live down the road) and after dinner go see my mum and family (about a 30 min drive away) it worked well so were gonna do that again this year providing i dont go into labour |
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snoopy21
Join date : 2010-08-20 Posts : 5101
About Me! My Name: Status: Mummy Number of Children: 1
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 7:27 am | |
| Last year was a frigging nightmare (Caitlins 1st xmas). I stupidly agreed in Oct that I would go to MILs for xmas dinner. We ended up having a row about something else and during the 'peace talks' I told her that I had decided that I wanted us to have our first family xmas dinner alone in our new house -she flipped and said that I was deliberatley hurting her again and sobbed to my mum that I did things like this all the time to her Anyway she got over it eventually... In the end FIL and his partner came over xmas eve at tea time (they are lovely and didnt once complain they werent actually seeing her on the day), went and saw my family from 10-1130am, MIL and SIL from 1145-1.30pm and then home to ours (We live in a 3 mile radius of eachother). It was great having the rest of the day to ourselves! Boxing day we go to my aunts and the sunday inbetween xmas and new year we go to his aunts so it works out pretty even. Could you work out something like that? I think 1hr or so is long enough. Its your family day now. xxx |
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abiD
Age : 36 Join date : 2010-09-09 Location : Southampton Posts : 18
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 7:28 am | |
| Its def a difficult one! Like others have said, you could do a mini Xmas day on boxing day with your parents. They will hopefully be really understanding that you would like your first Xmas at home, just the 3 of you. We've got a dilemna this year too as we've always gone to my parents for Xmas day then Tims parents for a couple of days boxing day onwards. However, who knows whats gonna happen now Faiths here, I'd love to carry on what we've always done cos I couldn't not see my parents on Xmas day! Its got to be whats best for you, David and Ava at the end of the day X |
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emmaXx
Age : 43 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : southampton Posts : 1280
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 7:32 am | |
| I think you should do what feel comfortable and ask your parents if they mind if u stayed at homeand saw them later on in day or boxing day x this is mine and kids first xmas without there dad and doing it split!! so he has them xmas eve and i have them xmas day.. will very very odd. but hey ho.. as for our parents!! well my mum buugers off to her freinds and my dad is god knows where... and his parentshavnt spoke to me since we split up .. so its a quiet one for us! |
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CarlaAndCallum
Age : 37 Join date : 2010-08-17 Location : Essex Posts : 4673
About Me! My Name: Carla Status: Mummy Number of Children: 1
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Sun Sep 26, 2010 10:18 pm | |
| I have to say im different i love being around all family at christmas x we can spend the day just us 3 anytime but i do understand why he wants to do that xx
ohs family live 2hrs away so will see them on boxing day but spend christmas day with my family xx |
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pinkyd
Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : durham Posts : 3931
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Mon Sep 27, 2010 12:51 am | |
| i was thinking more about it last night and we're just going to let everyone come, i think it would be a bit selfish not to involve them in ava's first Christmas, I'll just have to bite my tongue with OHs clan. |
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marie
Age : 38 Join date : 2010-08-18 Location : Kent Posts : 858
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Mon Sep 27, 2010 1:53 am | |
| its the same for us every year!! and you cant please everyone, just do what you think is best x |
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happy
Age : 37 Join date : 2010-09-18 Location : Ashford middlesex Posts : 2175
About Me! My Name: Becci Status: Mummy Number of Children: 2
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Mon Sep 27, 2010 4:02 am | |
| sounds like us.,.
i norm go n see my mum every year,,
but we also have to see the fil n oh, n mil n oh..
last year i had my mum for xmas lunch as other wise she would be on her own. n then had fil n what not round.. n then went to see the mil boxing day. but felt so bad as i norm see my nan on boxing day.. now my mil is hinting that she wants me to cook the first xmas dinner in their kitchen! i feel like saying bugeer off to evrey onme lol x |
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GuestGuest
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Mon Sep 27, 2010 6:52 pm | |
| we just pop round to my mums for an hour or so in the morning! We are hav ng dinner at oh's parents tho this year x |
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Amy
Age : 38 Join date : 2010-09-05 Location : Sunderland Posts : 2579
About Me! My Name: Amy Status: Mummy Number of Children: 1
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Mon Sep 27, 2010 11:08 pm | |
| We used to go to seperate familys until we gpt married last yr and had it at my mams. This yr we will be spending it with gavs family as it is his first xmas since his mam died. We will be going to see my family on the morning as gavs fmaily dont have dinner till about 3 ish. Then boxing day we will be spending with my family.
Ive said tho im not rushing around to see every1. if they want to see alfie they can come to me cos its bad enuf trying to transport a baby round anyway never mind in the snow, clarting loads of presents around.
x |
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Kinkyangel
Age : 46 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Leicester Posts : 1331
About Me! My Name: Clare Status: Mummy Number of Children: 3
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 12:07 am | |
| I usually have my Mum round from xmas eve til whenever she goes! Last year I didnt see my Dad as I wasnt speaking to him but have got back in contact with him so I am not sure what will happen! As far as Xmas day goes this year Mum is coming and cooking here, OH's Mum is coming here too! I will be doing as little as possible due to having the baby!
Not sure what's happening with the boys as their Dad is being a plank atm but usually the boys go there either xmas night or boxing day!
This boxing day OH will be going to the football with Jake if he is here and me, Mum and baby will be going to the Boxing Day meet!
xxxx |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 12:45 am | |
| I have offered for the parents to all come to my house this year as James wants our kids to spend Christmas at home and play with their toys without being taken around to visit people. So, baby will be here anytime between 7th and 21st December.... and im cooking for my dad, stepmum, mum, stepdad, mil and fil, and nan in law. I have put my foot down on all grandparents coming (apart from my OH's nan as she is totally on her own and MIL is an only child). So... 9 adults, a toddler and a newborn Lets not forget the hormonal woman who has just given birth too! Happy days! x |
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Kinkyangel
Age : 46 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Leicester Posts : 1331
About Me! My Name: Clare Status: Mummy Number of Children: 3
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 4:56 am | |
| Laura your brave! There will be 3 adults, 2 kids, newborn and a mad hormonal woman here! And that sounds bad enough to me!!!
I have told bump that he is being evicted 2 weeks early!
xxxx |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 4:59 am | |
| It seemed like a good idea at the time. Originally the mums were going to cook, but I really dont think I can bare the thought of somebody else cooking in my kitchen (im pathetic I know!!). x |
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pinkyd
Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : durham Posts : 3931
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 5:03 am | |
| Definately brave of you Laura, my dilemna doesnt seem so bad now! At least you get to stay in your own house though. Just make sure they do the washing up afterwards. |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 5:11 am | |
| - pinkyd wrote:
- Definately brave of you Laura, my dilemna doesnt seem so bad now! At least you get to stay in your own house though. Just make sure they do the washing up afterwards.
Lol.. I am on top of that... my dad has just replaced half of our kitchen and bought us a dishwasher! I think they are securing their invite! x |
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Kinkyangel
Age : 46 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Leicester Posts : 1331
About Me! My Name: Clare Status: Mummy Number of Children: 3
| Subject: Re: hmmmm dilemna Tue Sep 28, 2010 5:12 am | |
| I hate my mum cooking in my kitchen, she is a nightmare but its either that or I have to cook!! and tbh I can't face the thought of cooking xmas dinner!
xxx |
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