First topic message reminder :

I BF Caitlin for 8wks, then stopped due to her milk allergy. While it was easy in ways eg she latched on right from day one, I never got mastitis etc part of me was relieved when I had 'permission' to stop. (though i surprised myself when I spent a day or 2 crying/mourning the loss of the bond in my eyes, at that time)
Caitlin fed for an ave of 40min at a time and wanted fed every 90min-2hrs so often only an hr between feeds even at 7/8wks. I was exhausetd, emotional, she never settled or seemed content, screamed for hrs in the evening and then again from 3-6am (obviously that was her allergy). Once she got her special formula from the hospital she was like a whole new baby. Slept longer, fed more efficiently, settled as well as could be expected for her age....

Now when i think about having a 2nd im a bit mixed up about how I feel about BF. I think my experience is a bit squiff as caitlin prob not the best baby to compare. I just keep remembering how tired I was, how long it took, the fact i didnt get to build up the confidence to do it in public so hardly left the house & if i did it was a military operation between feeds... literally off the boob & GO GO GO!!

I know that I can BF, I know its free, convenient, a nice snuggly experience once you get it right BUT then there's part of me that thinks 'well caitlin is healthy & happy on the btl, whats the point in pressurising myself to do it with a 2nd.' Then another voice (i sound crazy lol), says that i did it for Caitlin for 8 wks so I MUST do it for a 2nd child for 8wks to give them the same goodness (But not a day longer as that wouldnt be fair on Caitlin - ha! ).

Did anyone else BF their 1st but not even try with their 2nd?
Do you think there is more pressure to do it for a subsequent child, or are you more likely to give up?

Did you not BF your 1st and so felt that you couldnt even try with your 2nd as it wouldnt be fair? (I have a friend who feels like this, she wished she had tried it with her son but now says she will never try it with any future sibblings as it wouldnt feel right).

Or did you not BF your 1st & it makes/made you more determined to succeed with a 2nd?

yeah i think in general the first couple of months the bf babies take the lead then btl fed babies take over...iv seen a bf baby chart on the net and oliver follows 50th centile almost perfect, but in the red book went from 50th up to the 75th then from 15 weeks gradually dropped to the 9th and settled there. think leo was just an exception to the rule, he was a chunk xx

from my experience the breastfed babies i know seem to be chunkier then the bottle fed.
both mine have followed or been just below the 50th centile
x

i expressed whilst ben was in intensive care. i used to feel like wow when i got 3/4ml of milk. but i nver got any more than that and he was wanting 4oz every 4hrs. i wasnt making anything near that i tried with alasdair and got my self so worked up and really beat my self up about it, i was under a huge pressure from the in laws too. i dried up. i got so engorged i was in agony

U wiud like to bf again with the next one when we eventually get round to it, but it depends a lot on how it will fit in with Sophia. I think though that next time i will mix feed to begin with until my milk comes in then I want the last feed of the day to be expressed or formula, just to take the pressure off.

Partly thats because i found it so hard in the beginning and Sophia got dehydrated coz she couldnt latch on properly and didnt drink often enough. HAving a bottle will ensure the next one gets enough in the early days and give me a break.

Also have thought about colostrum harvesting so i can have a supply ready in case the next one has problems latching on. From bitter experience, I know how painstaking it is to harvest it/to need to harvest it and then the lo to dribble it all out! but with a supply ready, at least its there in reserve!

But i think really, I have seen little difference in the health of babies on bottles and babies on breast (despite what the health professionals say) so dont think it will matter that much in the long run. Would def like for the next one to at least have a few days of it though. the only thing i did notice though, was that Sophia was far sickier when having a formula bottle then when breatfeeding which did put me off formula for her a bit.

I bfed for 15 1/2 months and loved it!

Mandy xx

LisaGandAmelia wrote:

I bf Amelia for 13 months which was when we both decided it was time to move to a cup. She was only on 1 feed a day at this point. But I have to say that apart from very cracked nipples at the beginning and a little trouble getting her to latch on in the 1st 24 hours, I had a VERY VERY easy ride of bf. I was so incredibly lucky. I have to say that bf does get easier in as much as they start to get a bit of routine around their feeds and eat more quickly and less frequently which makes life so much easier. When they have a growth spurt you feel like you're permenantly attached to them, but when you bf and they cry for food it's there ready and waiting. No worrying about sterilising and making up bottles, and of course so much cheaper.

Amelia never took a bottle (not through want of trying) so when/if I have a 2nd I'll try to introduce an expressed bottle much earlier as I'd have liked the option with Amelia. I think that would help with the going out and having to feed in public fear. x

Exactly the same!!! Even the length of time I BF Libby for

I have decided I will try and hopefully get BF established for the first 6 weeks then introduce a bottle. With Libby she stopped gaining weight at around 4 months but unfortunately no matter how hard we tried she just wouldnt have a bottle (this was an awful experience - I felt like I wasnt giving her enough but couldnt get her to have anything else - turns out she's just tiny )

I'm not putting any pressure on myself though - if things start getting hard or Libby doesnt get the attention she craves/deserves then I'll put him straight on the bottle, the mws/hvs can shove it xxx

Oh and with regards to weight - I always had the same impression as you that BF were smaller than formula fed but I've got a friend who's little girl has always been a right little chunker and she was BF for 8 months. xxx

C had bf for 2 weeks then expressed milk for 4 thewn went on bottles and shes a right dink despite being primarily bottle fed so i dont think thats true tbh. Am gonna try this time round but im not doing boob guilt!

Love that term Mario - boob guilt! Well said

One of the may forms of guilt parents take on. I stand by my signature lol, see my flag?