how what a child wears determines their credibility amongst their peers ?

my oldest starts high school in august ( omg he will be 12 soon where did the time go ! )
yes the school has uniform , black trousers , white polo shirt and school jumper and they are required to be worn so phew for that
but his footwear , school bag, P.E trainers and even the clothes he wears outside school hours will play a major role in whether he is deemed "suitable" to be a friend with !
its fecking awful in my opinion and he has not yet grasped that ppl who judge ppl on that are not worth worrying about , as i say he is still young ! He did question me whether he was going to be going to high school wearing george clothes !
it seems unless you are wearing , g star raw, eto, enzo ,henleys ,haywire,superfly ,superdry then you have problems !
I am not helping him learn any better but as his mum i will most probably try my hardest to ensure he has branded clothing , why ? , i remember being in school and seeing kids being picked on , bullied mentally and physically all down to them wearing cheap trainers etc ! I do not want my son to be one of those ppl !
maybe im just as bad as the kids for falling into this whole clothing farce ! hand on heart though what would you do ? anything you could do to prevent your child being the one thats picked on in and outside school ?
think back to when you were in school , do you remember that one person that was always getting the pi$$ ripped out of them for what they wore , maybe you were that child
Maybe i should be focusing more on helping him to learn to be who he is and that other ppls opinion dont matter but at this moment in his life clothes are important to him yes as he wants to be grown up and look good and cool but also as he knows that high school is going to be hard enough to break without the added pressure from peers !
whats your views ?

I can see why you're worried and it is wrong. However we lived in a very affluent area and my parents had no money so we were one of the only families that didn't have branded stuff. I think you get used to it fairly quickly. Admittedly one of my sisters made my dad park round the corner if he picked us up (we had a lada). I guess there probably were some people that made comments but I just ignored them and most said nothing. Its the same where I work. Most of the girls are actually quite sensitive about it. I wouldn't worry too much, especially in the current financial climate because should imagine many can't afford brands

I will (if I can afford it) give Tyler the stuff he wants to not be picked on.. I was picked on at school and anything that can be done to minimise the chance of Tyler being picked on I will do it.

I don't necessarily agree that it's right but I think that's life and kids are cruel :/

Its a horrible situation isn't it. I know it was really important to me growing up, we didn't have much money and I went to school across town where everyone was a bit more well off and I always felt I had to compete. My mum did everything to help us fit in, within her limits and I'm pretty sure I will do the same with Immi. I can't say I'll give in to every brand name she insists she needs to wear but I'll always try to keep her 'trendy' to avoid bullying.
I know we all say it doesn't matter what people think but when it comes down to it its just the world we live in and sometimes we need to give into that pressure just to keep ourselves/our kids happy.

Its horrible, but I remember the pressure so think I will try my best with Caitlin. Clothes will probably be the main birthday/Christmas presents when she is older as it will be hard to justify the money.

I imagine its harder with teenage boys though. Sports clothes and trainers seem to be the most expensive things. Im HOPING that Caitlin will appreciate Primark, H&M and be fashion concious in that way eg cheap and for this season. You could get 5-6 dresses and legging sets in primark for the price of Nike Air Max trainners. And football kits, omg the money you could spend on them!

I think it was harder when I was a teenager as Primark wasnt about/as acceptable. It did seem to be sportswear or topshop that teen girls shopped in. It must have been hard for my mum. Ebay these days too is good, although I know as a teenager I prob would have had a strop at something being second hand so I may have to keep that secret from Caitlin lol.

I'l do my best to stop Caitlin being picked on, but at the end of the day kids are cruel and if they decide they dont like you they will find a reason to tease eg fat, glasses, wrong colour pencil case, weird looking mum so while I will give n at some points and spend more than I would like, I do think self confidence needs to be taught as well. x

I was the single parent family in an affluent area so never had branded stuff although I never had to wear a uniform. The big thing I remember was that dockers were really in at one point but I couldn't have any. I wasn't all that bothered because I had shoes I liked and that was fine but I got really upset one day when a podiatrist came in to look at everyone's feet and they said my shoes weren't as good as the dockers for various reasons. I went home and cried but that was the only time.

I never wanted to conform, my tastes were different anyway so I think I had approval for daring to be different iykwim. I wasn't bothered about being in the "in crowd" I had my friends andwas happy but was never bullied. It later turned out it was they who thought we were cliquey - I had to laugh cos we would accept anyone who talked to us, it's just a lot of people didn't Boyer.

To this day I actively avoid most branded goods, I think a lot of them are tasteless anyway. For instance I love those Bench jumpers with thumbholes in the sleeves, but there's no way I'm walking about in something that's all logo and no design.

I don't know what I'll be like shopping for Imogen. We don't struggle like my mum had to but I don't think I'll kowtow to branding. I like to think I would find an equivalent which is a bit different but acceptable - let her have a style of her own, not to become a sheep. But we shall see!!

i never really asked for brand clothes/shoes as i got bullied from day one...don't know why lol maybe it's because i wasn't a @&£%/drank/smoked etc until i got to 17...good girl i was...lol BUT if the kids do bully for the sake of a name on a piece of clothing, and it gets to the point where he gets picked on then i will try my hardest to get him some things...but i'm not going to break the bank because of some heartless cruel children...i think kids pick on other kids because A) they feel threatned by them B) they just are complete cowards and pick on them for that exact reason or C) they have serious issues themselves...
pah! i'm really not looking forward to school years...why can't babies be babies forever

i can see where you coming from, but i never bothered with name stuff, i knew my mom and dad couldnt afford it, and if you ask me know to name brands i wouldnt have a clue..

my brother was more into the brands than me and still now, his girls have named stuff but they also get primark clothes too.

we brought rich a pair of trainers today £35 nike, i think thats too expensive for shoes, i think its silly money, but they were reduced and hes now in men sizes for shoes anyway (size 7)
but rich doesnt get that they are named at all, but russ prefers we buy him a decent pair so he looks smart.

but if rich was going to mainstream secondary school and didnt have his issues, then i suspect i may have the same issues with him wanting branded clothes, whether he got them would be another matter

Michelle, I'm right there with you. Paul is 14 and his wardrobe is fantastic, he has three different amemrican apparel hoodys and loads of Vans, abercrombie, holister, everything is top branded. But for school he happily wears George/tesco stuff. He tells me that all his friends also have these labels but sometimes I think I'm being taken for a mug by him! I think my worry is beingjudged by Paul and him making me feel crap for not getting him stuff!

Anyway, I can offer some reassurance for the mummies of girls. I have a 20 year old and my sis has a 15 year old and they are happy with primark, new look etc. Although both insist on Uggs!

i will do my best for my children, if we have plenty of money then i wont think twice about getting the brands, the only thing i wont buy is uggs and the latest chav trainers, if they want them then they will have to save up themselvesx

Hmmm, not sure really. My parents were comfortable and could easily have afforded the brands but just wouldnt buy me them, if I wanted a pair of branded trainers I would get them for xmas/birthday or have to save for them myself. I wasnt bullied as luckily alot of my friends parents were the same, and I honestly think it's taught me that if I want something I have work/save for it - we dont have any debt other than the mortgage and everything we've got we bought ourselves without credit.

I must admit that I do like them to have decent trainers, for example Libby has already had addidas, dcs, vans and etnies & Dexter already has a pair of vans and etnies waiting for him but thats because we like them, we dont buy branded clothes and dont intend to when they are older.

I hate that children demand the branded things to fit in with their friends and I hope that Libby and Dexter wont do it but I know they probably will.