I have offered to do Xmas day dinner for all of our parents so that I dont have to worry about leaving the house after having the baby.

My MIL said yesterday that she is doing a boxing day dinner because my BIL & SIL are not around on Xmas day.

I have told my OH that I wont be going, mainly because a) I will have just had a baby and want to try to bf and dont want to do it there, b) because I could still be bleeding and cant imagine anything worse than not being at home (I had that with Aimee in hospital for a month and dont want to do it again) - I like my own loo, and c) they drink like fishes and I will be the only sober one there, trying to protect my children.

I sent my OH an email today telling him that I wont be going (I excluded the drinking reason), but am happy to pop along for an hour in the morning so they can all see Aimee and baby (the in laws will have seen them on Xmas day at our house anyway).

I hope I dont come across as mean, but I also cant see any of them understanding why I wont be there.

Oh well! x

I think you are being MORE than generous laura having them to yours on xmas day and then visiting them for an hr on boxing day (tbh I wouldnt bother with boxing day...) You are going to have a newborn and the reasons you give are valid and should be accepted by inlaws, esp MIL who should understand what a womans body experiences after birth!

Im know exactly how you feel. When Caity was newborn MIL wanted me over every afternoon. I hated bleeding and worrying about leaks, and I only BF in private too so would have spent an hr of my visit hiding behind the closed door of the didning room and then have her complain that she couldnt see caitlin My hormones were crazy too so I ended up wanting to cry about every thing and kill my MIL everytime she spoke.... I wish Id put my foot down sooner!

Dont let yourself get too stressed. Enjoy your 1st xmas as a family of 4. Do what makes you happy, no one else!!! xxx

I can completely see where you are coming from here, like you say you will have just had a baby and want to try your hardest to get to grips with BF, the last thing you will need to be doing is stressing, you will want to be relaxed in your own home. I know what you mean about liking your own toilet too.

I also think as snoopy says above your being very generous having them all over from Christmas Lunch aswell.

xx

HI Laura

I think this is very reasonable. You are seeing people on christmas day so its not fair to expect you to do boxing day as weel, especially with a new baby x

I think your being more than fair tbh and if they don't understand that then it's just too bad for them really because you still wont be going mwahahaha!

Seriously though it's not fair of tem to expect you to go over all of boxing day when youve had them over for christmas and you'll have Aimee and a newborn to look after x

Yeah itis fair can totally understand why u wanna be at home x and theyll all get to see aimee and new baby anyway xx

I'm with the other ladies on this and I think you are being more than fair

xx

Thanks for all of your assurances that I am being fair.

My OH doesnt seem overly bothered, so hopefully we wont have any problems when the time comes xx

Just tell them politely but firmly, tell them what you have told us and if they aren't happy then tough!!!!!!! (LOL)
xx

I quite agree - I wouldn't want to be anywhere but home!
Do what you want - you're the one having the baby!

You're being more than reasonable. Hope they don't make an issue about it.

Me&sis have got to tell my mum that we're going to our Dad's for christmas with our grandparents. She's not going to be happy and i'm dreading it. It's silly though cause it's my life and i have my own little family now and can make my own decisions.

I agree with everthing that has been said by the other ladies and with any luck you won't have to go on Boxing day at all xx

I agree too! I am going no where this xmas! We are doing the family that dont live locally over new year this year!

xxx