First topic message reminder :

Nothing you havent heard before so dont feel you have to reply i just need to get it out to try to make some sense of it. I am even boring myself with it

Some of you may know my parents got back in touch with me in Sept after being estranged since i was pregnant with Sam after a massive fall out. I will write the basic reasons down.
They intefered in my life
they had an obbsession with my oldest treating her as if she were their own,
They never accepted Ben even though he is the most lovely laid back person ever
They ssaid i shouldnt have Sam when i was pregnant
They rang the social services on me out of spite
They got back in touch with my ex (who used to beat me)
They turned my whole family and most of the village where i am from against me
The contested Chel and Toms adoption by Ben that they had previously been totally behind out of spite meaning that it didnt go ahead
They basically made my life hell


Now they have got back in touch with a view to wanting to meet up cause they are so desperate to see the kids (they have never met Sam)
I have chatted to them a few times has have the kids but i feel detached and without feeling for them.
Now my brother has got in touch telling me how they have been falling out for ages and i was right about them and they have problems etc. Now he also wants to meet up. He says his kids are desperate to see mine.

The problem i have with all this is my parents have obviously not changed, my brother didnt wanna know me for years and he has now told me he has resented me all this time cause i was the favourite . I want to tell them you have made my life hell, tried to ruin my relationship with Ben, and disowned me for the last 18 months. But it will just cause more trouble. They are all sorry but i cant help feeling that i am being a mug. I mean 18 months is a long time and
TBH i feel like telling them all to feck off. They seem to think they can just come back into my life say how sorry they are and how wrong they all were and everything will be just fine but i just cant be right. I fell so wronged by and i cant get past it. I dont want to turn bitter but i dont want them in my life. If truth be known i still want to hurt them and make them feel shit. But i have set off letting them talk to the kids and now i feel like i cant stop it cause it wouldnt be fair to the kids.

Phew that went on!!!

hun, i've not been around so do not know the full story, but from what i've read, i'd say that they dont deserve you or your kids in their lives.

however they are still your parents and the kids grandparents, so do have a role, however what that role is, depends on you.

howabout taking control of the calls, once a month or once a fortnight, nothing more for now, hun you got christmas coming and its an easily emotive time.

also sending a hug xx