I posted last week about my eldest son losing clothes and making him pay for his own school shirts. Now he has lost his trainers. He doesnt know where he left them, cant remember if he left them at school. I know for deffo they havent been stolen cause the werent a named brand and they were a bit tatty.

I actually wanna smack him, hard (actually i could punch him). I dont know how i have kept control. He still didnt find his trousers he lost or the shirts.

I could just bawl my eyes out with frustration He just lives in his own bloody world

Now i am actually crying

Aww hun we have this with ceejay we and his mu buy him clothe but neither of us actually have any. It is frustrating when ceejay lost his trainers we bought him a pair for 4.99 from the cheap shoe shop.

ahhhh mara, what a little bugger!!!

is there no way you could take something off him for every time he loses his clothes!?!

it amazes me how they manage...i never lost any of my clothes when i was at school!

I think that Kenty may be right... you need to really start making him see the value of things.

Take a computer game off him or something and make him sell it on ebay to pay for new trainers.

I know it sounds harsh, but it seems its the only way to make him take care of the things he owns.

He will think twice in the future!

x

Mara have u been into the school your self and looked at lost property or had a word with anyone? If i lost things at school i couldnt even be bothered to go to lost property as i knew my mum would just buy me another one bad i know. Or maybe hes too shy to ask? I know they may not of been stolen but could some kids be picking on him or hiding them?
If he has just lost them though i would be mad too! Id just buy him a really cheap pair.

I have just rang the school and had a word with the learning mentor. She is going to have a word with him. I really do think he is just leaving them. I think the problem is they are spoiled pure and simple. They dont look after anything not even at home.
They have Wii, PSP, PS3 DS and if you asked them where all the games are they couldnt tell you or they would be scratched.
I even have to tell them to brush their teeth and get washed on a morning! If you ask them to do anything its either not done or done half hearted.
I really think i need to make some changes.

aww hun sorry your so angry, I hope you manage to sort something out with him.
And for the record, my son is exactly the same with ds, wii, xbox games and it drives me insane that every morning i have to aske him to brush his teeth and get dressed etc.
I've stopped the telly being on in the mornings until he's ready for school and that seems to be really making a difference!

Ah Mara i feel for you, i look back now at how we treated my mum and feel so ashamed! None of us lifted a finger around the house and expected everything to be done for us. Then one day my Mum snapped and walked out Scared the life out of me and defo gave me the wake up call i needed!

I'd make him do without! It's the belief that ok never mind mum will get me dome more that makes them so bloody careless.

I work in 6th form college and our lost property is over flowing with designer clothes, trainers, iPods the kids just couldn't be arsed looking!

really pen! what happens to it all if its not claimed?

Is it a boy thing, did you have this with Chelsea? I seriously can't understand how you could loses youre trainers/trousers/shirts!

Kell wrote:

really pen! what happens to it all if its not claimed?

kell.... I don't know what happens to it! But I'm going to find out!

Awwwww Mara - I Hate that you feel like this I agree with the comments about giving him consequences for his actions.

Hope you are feeling better by the time yo read this

xx

Mara..here is another thing to consider. Do you think he is getting bullied at school? The only reason I am asking this is because one of Matt's friends back in the day was constantly having his stuff taken..dumped in the toilets..hidden..and even destroyed. Out of fear..he would keep silent when his mom would ask him where his stuff was disappearing too. I hope this is not the case. xxx

Hello again. Well he has come home from school trainers in hand, plus his rucksack i didnt even know he had lost!!! In lost property!!! So the answer Jen is no he isnt getting bullies, he is just a complete plank!!! xx

Glad he got them back x

I'm glad he isn't..but ain't happy that he is being so forgetful. This may be a harsh idea..but he may learn from it the first time..is to bag up any prized possession he has..and hide it for a few days...then make him earn each item back. He will begin to understand that every item..even simple things like clothing cost..and not to be taken for granted.

My son is 11 also and in the last year at primary. He doesn't lose stuff as such but I do too much for them and have the same every morning with deodorant, hair teeth Grrr I walk to school every morning having packed their bags and loaded pram thinking we've done this for 6 years when will it click what needs doing without the shouting and screaming every day .... He goes to senior school next year and I am going to stop doing it all. He'll soon learn through detentions and bad breath comments

Emma, as a mum of a 13 year old. As soon as he starts high school it'll all change. Before you know it he'll ne stinking the house out with Linx and you'll be moaning that he's going through two tins a week lol!

Time to get tough with the layabout boys and girls ladies

I am a harsh, strict mum.

Wil has to help get his own clothes out in a morning, make an attempt at brushing his teeth, put his own stuff in his room/ toy boxes, get his own shoes from the rack and put them back in the evening, help put cat and dog food in the bowls, help clean up any mess he makes and I take advantage of the fact he loves hoovering and get him to do that...

he will be 18 months on Saturday

GillandWil wrote:

Time to get tough with the layabout boys and girls ladies

I am a harsh, strict mum.

Wil has to help get his own clothes out in a morning, make an attempt at brushing his teeth, put his own stuff in his room/ toy boxes, get his own shoes from the rack and put them back in the evening, help put cat and dog food in the bowls, help clean up any mess he makes and I take advantage of the fact he loves hoovering and get him to do that...

he will be 18 months on Saturday

Snap! Lily has to put her clothes in the washing basket, put her empty cup in the sink and put toys away before the next ones come out etc.

I am sure it is easier now than when they are teenagers though as there is none of the backchat and stomping off!

Wow Gil you have him well trained

Exactly Kate, Hayden is fine! but as soon as they hit school age their peers teach them lazy lay about habits, attitudes to kill , plus to an extent I think argh they've been at school all day, then an hour of homework, then dinner, shower etc when do they get time to do chores?? They have to clean&hoover their rooms and strip their beds, I remake, they put washing in barrow and elder 1 loads/ unloads dishy ..it's the ferking mornings that do me in ...
I've always vowed as a mum of 3 boys, my kids will not leave home until they can cook a basic meal, iron a shirt ( probably linen to prove my point) change a bed, use a Hoover, washing machine and lawnmower!!
Purely as their father (elder 2) knew bugger all when we moved in together I felt sorry for him - at 21 his mum changed his bed wtf !! I would never put my boys in that situation!

Oh i do make them do, they all have chores, Chelsea puts the washing in when i ask her, they put their own clothes away, they know how to use an hoover, washer, microwave, kettle, duster etc and they know how to clean their teeth, they have been bloody doing it long enough its just pure idleness. Typical teenagers i suppose. Its just constantly having to be on their backs about it. Drives me mental!!!

LOL! Not only are you a mom..housekeeper..nurse..chauffeur...counselor...peace keeper...but also a drill sergeant! No wonder at the end of each day were are collapsing from exhaustion! xxx