my eldest daughter Mollie, will be 17 in a few weeks Anyway I just had a phonecall from the head of her year, (shes doing A Levels) to say she wants to drop one of her subjects as shes struggling with it but the truth of the matter is, shes not applying herself as well as I know she can!! In fact she literally only has 4.5 weeks left before she takes the exam. Myself and her head of year agreed that it will only take a plan of action for her to get up to date. I know I will have drama when she gets in but I want her to knuckle down and get on with it as I know she can!! She will try to convince me its a good idea to drop it but she needs to finish this as she will be short of an AS level if she doesnt carry on!! So how do I get through to her???? Help!!!!!

I think i would just be clear that it is too late to drop it now and that she needs to do the best she can and that you will help her all you can. If she is ranty then i would try and stay calm and say that once she has had half an hour to calm down then you will sit with her and see what needs to be done.

If all that fails you could resort to blackmail in the form of if you pass all of your exams then you will get her something that she wants!!

Just try as best you can to explain that her dropping one now will mean she has to wait longer for uni, or that if she doesnt go back and finish next year then what she has is a waste

yes I think I know what I need to say to her but she will make a massive drama out of it, I know she will!! I think Kate it will be blackmail as nothing else will work! Mind you, a few of her friends dropped out of school at the end of last year as they decided they didnt like it. The trouble is, if she does end up losing this year, she will end up just like You said, Lisa, going to Uni later than her friends who are still in school!! God, give me a toddler any day!!!!

How many as-levels is she doing? And what subjects are they? I did 4 and altho my mum always said i wasnt applying myself and i could do better, i struggled with them as they were all heavy reading &essay writing subjects. It does seems silly to drop it now, i'd make a compromise with her and say if she's taking 4 now she can drop this subject next yr. As i know quite a lot of my friends only did 3 a levels or did 3levels and 1 as level so at the end of the yr they ended up with 3 alevels and 2 as levels. This might spur her on to just get it all done and out the way. Sorry not much help, I don't know what your daughter is like but I know at that age I did what I wanted no matter what my mum did to try and help. good luck xx

Shelli, she only took 3 in the end as she decided that she would rather do well in 3 than scrape through 4! Seems like she will be lucky to scrape through any at the moment! The thing is, I know she has it in her to do well but she needs a kick up the bum every now and again. Shes enjoying her social life etc but I am gonna have to start being tough on her I think! Wish me luck!!!

Hmm yeah deff sounds like she should be able to do 3. How much does she go out? maybe make compromises with her social life, like she can go out sat night only if she does a certain amount of work etc. Is getting her a tutor an option? x

its funny you said that Shelli cos she suggested a tutor herself a couple of weeks ago but I said I wanted to talk to the school first to see what they thought and when I mentioned it to her head of year, she said she actually doesnt need a tutor just a week or 2 of knuckling down!!!

Sounds like you gota be the tough mean mummy for a bit. and keep reminding her once she does it all shes got all summer to party it up

yikes not looking forward to this when my 2 get there!!!

erm mind I did the same, I dropped an as level just before exams as I just felt I couldnt do it but I didnt tell my mum or dad, woops but I look back now and regret it loads. It would have also been a case of me just getting on with it.
but luckly didnt effect me what I wanted to do after 6th form (mind I still dont know what I want to do lol)

erm I dont know what the answer is.... just a good talking to I think, knuckle down for 4 weeks or what ever it is then its done. I dont know what else to say as when I was the age I know what ever anyone said to me Id do the opposit (still do lol akward cow I am) erm I dunno sorry hels not much help am I! tell her to get to it and you'l pay for a night out in matise!! lol (that place still open?!?!) xx

Oh dear, rather you than me helz!

All I can add is, be very careful it sounds like she is genuinly struggling and crying for help to me, you said she asked for a tutor and now she's gone to ask to drop a subject.
AS's are so much harder that GCSE's and she is probably finding the pressure a bit too much, I'd be inclined to let her have the tutor if she still wants one, it's not going to cost you a massive ammount if it's only for 5 weeks and it might just rebuild the confidence back that she sounds to have lost. If you just lecture her on trying harder she could just turn round and drop out all together.

Good luck with it though, I'm seriously dreading that age, I still remember how much of a handfull I was!

I agree with Jolene hun even though the school say she doesn't need a tutor maybe it will give her the confience to go through with the exams and to knuckle down.
My sister just did her GCSEs last year and she had zero confidence in herself. she really needed "boosting" to go through with the exams she wanted to not bother as she thought she'd faily anyway but she actually did really well.

I think talk to her and say you will get her a tutor to help her with these last few weeks, all the hard work she has put it up to now will be a waste if she doesn't even sit the exam and I bet she knows a lot more than she thinks she does!
and like Kate says - if all else fails blackmail will probably do the trick

Good luck to you hun! Very dificult age to try and make them see sense, I don't envy you at all hun x

mmmmmm blackmail is the way to go I think. Maybe promise her a treat/holiday/money if she sticks at it - good luck xx

Lol, I think I would go with the blackmail thing too.

If she only has 4.5 weeks left, she would be mad to give up the subject now xx

How did it go honey?