| How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend | |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 8:31 pm | |
| I have been doing a lot of thinking all weekend and after finding out she is sleeping with my married (with children) boss, I can no longer be friends with her.
This may sound harsh, but she is doing this for kicks and the thrill of it, not because she likes him. I cant be friends with somebody with those morals.
So... I have brought my mat leave forward at work so I only have 4 weeks left with them both.
If anybody has any other ideas on how I can do this then opinions are very welcome. I am supposed to be going to her house tomorrow night, which I am going to pull out of.
I also wont be going back to my job either, which was prob going to be my decision anyway, but now my mind is pretty much made up.
I just hope that I can fade away without her tryin to keep being friends with me.
Neither of them know that I know about them so I can't just tell them both to sod off.
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DonnaAdmin
Age : 47 Join date : 2010-08-17 Location : Wakefield Posts : 3100
About Me! My Name: Donna Status: Mummy Number of Children: 0
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 9:06 pm | |
| I would just keep crying off saying you are busy with the kids. She will get the message eventually. I admire you for your morals xxx |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 9:12 pm | |
| Lol Mara, my morals are not that great... if he tries to screw me over with my job (she has been put on perm hours now to cover my role while I am off) then I will send the email (I have it in my home emails now) to all of the staff and his wife I wont be going back, but I want it to be my choice, not theirs. Ideally, I would like to be able to ask for redundancy, but not sure how I can work that one at the end of my mat leave... something I will be posting about in 9 months or so, lol! x |
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mariheartselijah
Join date : 2010-08-23 Posts : 8143
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 9:54 pm | |
| i vote for block and delete! if you can't face telling her you you're done with it, just completely ignore her...people get bored very easily! |
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pinkyd
Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : durham Posts : 3931
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 9:57 pm | |
| If it was me I would have to tell her that I know, thats me though and you just have to do what feels right. |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 10:10 pm | |
| - pinkyd wrote:
- If it was me I would have to tell her that I know, thats me though and you just have to do what feels right.
I fully intend to, but I need to protect my position at work first, especially as I am her boss and about to go on maternity leave. I have full access to my boss's email account, but it still isnt going to look good that I came across the email. I am trying to be careful so that I dont end up being the one that all of this backfires on. But, once my maternity leave is over and I dont go back/get redundancy, then I will be making my feelings very clear. x |
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mariheartselijah
Join date : 2010-08-23 Posts : 8143
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 10:30 pm | |
| yeah, i think biding your time is probably the way forward, there was a lot of dodgy goings on at my work before i went on maternity, but i just left it because i knew it was going to get dealt with - i couldn't take the risk of jeopardising my maternity and not having the option of having a job to go back to |
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DonnaAdmin
Age : 47 Join date : 2010-08-17 Location : Wakefield Posts : 3100
About Me! My Name: Donna Status: Mummy Number of Children: 0
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 10:55 pm | |
| I would blackmail them both. Leave little pictures of thing you would like them to buy you with a reminder of the email underneath |
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Kinkyangel
Age : 46 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Leicester Posts : 1331
About Me! My Name: Clare Status: Mummy Number of Children: 3
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 11:00 pm | |
| When I read the title I thought we were going to be working out how to get rid of a dead body!!!! I agree biding your time til your maternity leave is over and then getting the best deal you can even if it means being a little underhand!!! xxx |
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MrsDebs
Age : 43 Join date : 2010-08-18 Location : Stockport Posts : 2645
About Me! My Name: Debs Status: Mummy Number of Children: 2
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Sun Oct 17, 2010 11:04 pm | |
| Ooh I like maras idea! Do that! xx |
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Clare
Join date : 2010-09-13 Location : UK Posts : 3503
About Me! My Name: Clare Status: Mummy Number of Children: 2
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Mon Oct 18, 2010 3:16 am | |
| hun, i'd keep your head down, i know its going to be hard, but if you pretend you dont know, they may let more slip... giving more information for you. |
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jenshayne
Age : 54 Join date : 2010-08-17 Location : Canuckville Posts : 3290
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Mon Oct 18, 2010 3:31 am | |
| God Laura, what a horrible place to be in. I would just tell her the truth, how you find it offensive that she is sleeping with someone who is married with kids, and thinking of it as some sort of game. How you by being her friend is condoning it, and you can no longer continue being her friend because you are ashamed of her. xx |
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Emmylou
Age : 52 Join date : 2010-08-19 Location : Essex, UK Posts : 1202
About Me! My Name: Status: Number of Children:
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Mon Oct 18, 2010 4:29 am | |
| Im with Mara, but you could work it the other way.... At the end of your maternity approach and ask for redundancy just dropping into the conversation you know about the extra marital stuff - may be all over with but karma for them both hey!! |
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LisaMnGirls
Age : 46 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Lancashire Posts : 1367
About Me! My Name: Lisa Status: Mummy Number of Children: 2
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Mon Oct 18, 2010 4:59 am | |
| I know exactly how u feel.....im in a horrid situation too with 'friends' My hubbies 'so called' best mate (known each other from school etc) is married with 2 very young children (we were pregnant at the same time on both occasions), and so I am good friends with her! She is a bit of a pushover (unlike me - lol).......but still doesnt excuse the fact that over the last 3yrs hes been having it off with basically anything!! This all came out a couple of months ago, and OH told me! I was livid, as they only got married in December - why did he bother????? He told my OH that he still loves his wife, but that he cant live without having sex with 'new' women.....he has lots that know about his situation who are just F*** buddies!!! Makes my skin crawl........ This bloke and his wife are Islas godparents, and this is what infuriates me....I would never in a million yrs have had them if id have known!! I said to Chris that I needed to have it out with him, but he has begged me not to because the crowd 'he' is hanging about in are coke heads, and hes scared of the backlash. He reckons its their buisness....but I AM SOOOO MAD !!! So Laura, I cant help but im glad I got all that off my chest, and sorry for hoggin your post!! |
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GuestGuest
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Mon Oct 18, 2010 5:05 am | |
| I'm with mara on this one! |
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Laura
Age : 45 Join date : 2010-08-16 Location : Northampton Posts : 6084
| Subject: Re: How to dispose of a 'so called' best friend Mon Oct 18, 2010 5:10 am | |
| Lisa... what a nightmare! Esp. as you are friends with them both, you must feel so stuck in the middle. I am really glad that I can turn my back on all of it when I start my maternity leave. I spoke to my OH earlier and I think when the time comes next year I am going to call their bluff about going back, and then let them know that I know. And also say that I would accept redundancy and take my pay out and run (if he goes for it, that is!). x |
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