Right, Cerys is an angel baby; cheerful, smiley, sleeps and eats well..........................BUT........ in the last few weeks has been throwing hissy fits or tantrums, especially when you take something from her that she has i.e toy,bit of paper,anything really She also has a tantrum and screams blue murder when she cant do something like reach a toy in the tub (frustration obviously).
Her scream must be about 500 decibels lol !!! Obviously i want to nip this in the bud now before it turns into something unmanageable. Any good tips on how to deal with this??? Do you also think this is her way of trying to communicate because she is not talking yet??

HELP !!!!!!

just ignore it completely.

If she starts one just make sure she is safe and walk away. When she realises that she isn't getting any attention from it they will shorten and eventually stop.

One of my core beliefs is that for children any attention is good attention so if you give the tantrum attention she will do it all the more.

Also if she is getting frustrated because she can't do something wait until she calms down and then offer to help, encourage her to do it and avoid doing it for her.

(I have been doing this with Wil for a while and it is working)

thanks hun !!!! My saviour Thats along the same lines as Tracy Hoggs advice "Baby Whisperer" and i have alot of respect for her values and advice xx

thanks Gill - im gonna follow that too xx

Yes think il follow that too xx

im gonna have to toughen up a bit,its gonna be hard walking away. Well its easier than ending up in a mental assylum

I have to agree too, Tyler always trys pulling my curtains and the more I told him not to the more he did it... now I ignore him he doesn't really touch them at all.

He's too young to understand the difference between NO or any other kind of attention he gets so ignoring him is the only thing that works

Minimeg he's also started the tantrums when I take things off him

We ignore our LO when he creates or if he's doing something 'naughty' and trying to get attention, his latest trick is to stand on the coffee table stomping his feet so I watch from a safe distance and try not to rise to it. Cos he's not getting the attention he soon stops.

Also the mega tantrums that kicks off when we close/lock the front/back door..full on banging on the door, stomping his feet, crying screaming. I just walk away and ignore it. I'm just having a job on trying to convince OH to do the same..he pander's to him

I agree 100% with Gill - have always done it and we very rarely have tantrums, and those we do get are so short that its not a problem.

I do the same for most unwanted behaviours (as per that book I am reading How to Behave so your kids do) - so if she starts to be naughty with her food I don't say anything, I just take it away and move on, I pretty sure If I reacted she would do it more often

That book is great and makes me look at parenting so differently, for example I saw a mum with 2 kids and the girl about 7 was walking behind and said Mummy! The mum shouts/whines 'what now' in a really horrible voice - no care in her voice what so ever and I just thought what a horrible way to talk to your child - and you wonder why they talk back to you in the same horrible tone!?

Another thing is I say why she cant have it - like 'No, thats Mummys', or No thats Hot' ...that way she knows I'm not just taking it away to be mean

Izzy is hilarious when she has a what she thinks is a proper tantrum...she gets on the floor and shouts, but she doesnt throw herself to the floor..she gently sits down and lays back flat on her back and shouts..its hard not to laugh at her!

Lisa wrote:

Another thing is I say why she cant have it - like 'No, thats Mummys', or No thats Hot' ...that way she knows I'm not just taking it away to be mean

I do that too, I will always give a reason why, like hot, dangerous etc but OH just keeps saying No! Naugty!..I keep telling him to say 'why' - he's not being naughty, but you need to explain WHY!!!!
Argh - he's driving me up the wall, then he makes out like i'm always changing the rules

Also, if I ask Oliver to put something back or what ever, I will give him a warning - ie; 'i'm going to count to 3 then you've to put it back'. If found by doing this he doesn't throw his violent paddy's as he know's whats coming and its not just me coming in and taking stuff off him to be 'mean!'.

ZeeMoo wrote:

Lisa wrote:

Another thing is I say why she cant have it - like 'No, thats Mummys', or No thats Hot' ...that way she knows I'm not just taking it away to be mean

I do that too, I will always give a reason why, like hot, dangerous etc but OH just keeps saying No! Naugty!..I keep telling him to say 'why' - he's not being naughty, but you need to explain WHY!!!!
Argh - he's driving me up the wall, then he makes out like i'm always changing the rules

Also, if I ask Oliver to put something back or what ever, I will give him a warning - ie; 'i'm going to count to 3 then you've to put it back'. If found by doing this he doesn't throw his violent paddy's as he know's whats coming and its not just me coming in and taking stuff off him to be 'mean!'.

Yup we do that too (well I do and Dan SHOULD but argghh FFS he doesnt and I hear him just repeating Isabelle come away from that..over and over lol!)

I tell her to come away/put it back/stop it once, then I tell her I will come and get her if she doesnt stop/go away...the 3rd time I say I warned you now I am coming
Most of the time she is gone by the 2nd warning! If she isnt and Ipick her up and move her she doesnt have a hissy fit but I reckon If I did it first off then she would for sure

Zee and Lisa this is the sort of parenting i try and follow. You see so many kids say "sorry" and they dont actually learn from it cos they dont know that what they were doing was wrong. Lisa it really makes me mad when i see mums/dads speak to their kids like that Grrrrr. Its my child that has to go to school then with these unruly kids !! x