Ok here goes possibly the most long winded, whingiest birth story ever!
Didnt sleep at all sat night as was having pains on and off in my back. At 9am I woke Stuart & told him this could be the start of things, by then they were every 15-20min. Continued pottering about house, had shower/breakfast etc. By 11am they were every 10-12 min and getting sorer but still bearable and I wasnt 100% convinced it wasnt just a false alarm. At 1pm rang my mum and told her id possibly be needing her to come to hospital with us. Rang MIL to ask her to be on standby to sit with Caitlin & she said she couldnt as she was just heading out the door to to xmas shopping with her boyf Stuart went nuts at her & id to calm him down. He rang his sister and thankfully she said she could. MIL did ring back and say she could come over later on if we wernt away already and stu told her to get stuffed. 2pm mum came over and pains were getting worse & every 8-10min. Rang Hospital & said to wait until they were 5min apart or totally unbearable. By 3pm they were still only every 8 min but I decided to get SIL to come over and settled with Caitlin. She brought her boyf of 5 months with her so contracting in front of him was pleasant! Rang my uncle (no taxi!! ) & left for hospital at 4pm...

Arrived at hospital at 430pm & was examined - 3cm, baby def on way & prob be early hrs of morning. They wouldnt admit me until I was 4cm so sent me off & said to walk about until 630pm. Walked round to cafe at hospital & had a fun filled hr contracting in front of strangers and trying to look like I was just casually eating a gravy chip By 6pm I couldnt cope anymore & decided to go back to mat ward. By time I got there at 6.10pm the contractions were coming every 3-4 min and I thought I was going to die Was examined & was 5cm. Had to wait about until 6.45pm to be brought up to delivery were I nearly snatched the g&a off the MW as I stomped threw the door! Id already said I wanted an epidural so MW went off to arrange one.... Joked to mum & Stuart that I might try and go without an epidural.... ah how we laughed at the though of that.... 2min later MW returns telling me anethatist is in surgery with a c-sec atm, then someone had a retained placenta & needed him and a 3rd woman had requested an epidural 20 min before me, so if she was honest with me , by the time he got to me id prob have delivered
At 8pm MW examined me & I was 7 nearly 8cm. She told me if I wanted pethidine to get it now or it would be too late so I agreed to it. What a pile of poo that drug is!!!!! Honestly it did relax me between contractions but as soon as one started I was like a cat with a rocket up my arse jumping off the bed howling and wailing like a walrus. So for about an hr I spent 1min lying eyes rolling tongue hanging out slabbering down myself & then 1min behaving like a beast alternatively
At 930pm they checked me and I was 9cm so they broke my waters. From then the contractins were pretty much constant. I had to lie on my side for a while so they could do a trace on baby who's heart rate was dipping a bit. Pressure then started & at about 10pm it was time to push - worst f*cking experience of my life!!! Pethidine had worn off and was too late for top up and I couldnt use G&A properly while pushing

The pressure was ridiculous. It wasnt the stinging that made it unbearable, I actually felt like my pelvis was going to snap. The MWs made me put my hands behind my legs and push but it was awful so I kept trying to put my hands behind my head to hold on to bed and push dowm. They were getting quite ratty with me by this stage as they couldnt find his heart rate consistently and when they did it was taking a bit to long to recover. As horrible as this sounds it didnt really register with me. Mum and Stuart ended up taking a leg each and physically holding my hands behind my kness as they all screamed at me to push. Eventually nature took over and I started doing what I was told but jesus christ I never want to feel that again.

Joshua George Maxwell was born at 10.20pm weighing 8lb 5.5oz. When they said it was a boy I felt nothing at all - it certainly didnt make me push harder thats for sure! Think I was in pure shock at what id just experienced. Stuart went off to ring ppl and I promptly filled 6 kidney dishes full of vomit Think it was a mix of pethidine/shock. Got a few stitches but nothing major, doesnt even sting when I pee though havent braved a poo yet Went up to ward at about 130am and felt really not with it. Got NO sleep as the ward had about 24 new born babys on it all squealing (apart from my doped up son who slept all night )Even yday ppl sounded far away when they were talking to me and I couldnt compute what they were saying. Think its a mix of no sleep since fri night and the pethidine. Got home yday afernoon and am doing combined feeding atm. BF whole time in hospital but due to pethidine he very hard to latch so have gave btls in last 24 hrs. MWs were encouraging me to hand express and syringe feed but I was too exhausted to give it a proper go. Think im going to try and BF tonight again though and see how it goes now he is wakened up.

So there you have it! The longest most dramatic account of a straightforward birth ever! I am never having sex again because the thought of doing that again is enough to tip me over the edge. When mum left the hospital on sun night she asked if I thought I was going into a psychosis as I just kept repeating how 'im not really here' & 'you all sound so far away'
Ah tis all worth it. My wee man is such a cutie! I'l try add pics in a bit! x

Awww snoops even with the pain your birth does sound pretty good, so glad you have your little man home and your all ok!

I had diamorphine and felt exactly the same as you discribed, it took the edge off the contractions a little but was still in toe curling pain! In between was amazing lol
Oh joy I have it all to come in the near future!

tehehehe Im glad you survived a natural birth with no epidural...I knew you could do it...and in a few days you will have forgotten all about it and be ready for number 3

How many pethidines did you have then? I never felt drowsy or odd at all, but mine was 6 hours before I had her so maybe made a difference?

Aww snoopy congratulations on your baby boy !!
Your account sounds just like mine - bloody painful !

enjoy your litte man and have a fab xmas xxxxx

I had one jab of pethidine at about 8pm I think & she said it lasted about 2hrs when I could get more. At 10pm I asked for more just as I was pushing and they said it was too late/lied to me that it would work for 4 hrs - bollocks!!!

I dunno if it was affects of pethidine or exhaustion but even today I still feel a bit spacey. I had co-codomol after I had him at 6am and again felt awful for a cpl hrs after that & have stuck to paracetamol since - afterpains arent nice either!!!

Number 3????? Would need to be a bloody adoption!!!!!!!

what a story ! glad you did it without epidural

i love pethidine and i remember being a right doped up cow just after birth
in a couple weeks you will be ready for number 3 lol !

congrats again he is very cute !xx

ps give the mil a slap( a friggin hard one ) for choosing xmas shopping over caitlin duties but d it real quick then blame the fact you still got preg hormones running about ya

oooh snoops, sounds awful lol

What does Caitlin think of her brother?
x

Congratulations. Doesn't sound fun though. I hated pethidine. It just did nothing. Can't wait to see some pics

Awww snoopy well done for doing it with no epidural your birth sounds pretty straight forward and I agree with the othersyou'll be ready for no.3 soon lol. Hope caitlin likes her new baby brother x

congratulations hun,xxxxx


and im sorry but im pmsfl @ the cat with a rocket up its arse lmao.xxxx

awwwwwww sounds fine - in a couple of weeks you will be like 'yeaaaaaaah i didn't need an epidural he just popped right out' and you will honestly, hand on heart, forget the horrors

im really pleased for you that it was so quick/straightforward/relatively drama free (except for...you...obviously haha )

how is the bf going? are you managing to carry on with it a bit? good luck with the first poop how is caitlin getting on?

did you lose much blood? apparently the totally spaced out/exhausted way i felt was because of the blood i lost, if you aren't on iron its probably worth getting some (won't do any harm anyway)

you should be so proud of yourself can't wait to nose at some photos x

congrats you baby name stealer! we clearly both have great taste. i was quite looking forward to seeing the birth announcement for Brody though

sounds like you did really well especially seen as you were expecting epidural and it didnt happen.

congratulations!! hope Caitlin loves her new brother xx

oh jeeze ur making me super broody right now! i LOVE listenin to peoples birth stories! well done you! x x x

aww Congratulations x
You will forget the birth i had nothing i only just made it through the hospital door and i was adament id never have another baby but i do now xx

LOL what a fab story, the way you've put it really made me giggle Well done you Snoops xxx

Congratulations,
I had same sort of birth with Sean asked for an epidural and couldn't have one so ended up with pethidine, I just fell asleep though lol
Hope you're all doing well x

Well done Snoops!! Haha i agree, you will be broody again soon... x x x

Ahhhh Snoops you did amazing! Did giggle too at the wording of it too. Now you know that it was a woman giving natural birth who coined the phrase - Ripping you a new areshole - came from! I am very proud of you and he is soooo beautiful! My hats off you to! xxxx

Aww congratulations hun!

he is a right cutie !! xx

1. He is absolutely gorgeous - you must be so proud.

2. Im sooo pleased for you - congratulations.

3. I wish I hadnt read this and have gone into a total panic! x

Congratulations lovely snoopy! And welcome to the world little Joshua! By the way, love the name, its the name i've been thinking of for a long time!

Lotsa love, enjoy your lovely little family,

Mandy xx

Well done you...So glad you had a reasonably straight forward birth.. Lovely name and am off to look for pictures

Oo hows Caitlin, does she like him... or like my middle child said to Hayden "he smells funny"

Sorry Laura, didnt mean to scare any pregnant people! If you ask me again in a week il give you a nicer description as the memories fade Just get a fecking epidural lol!!!!

Shell - Joshua was the name that id picked for Caitlin but for some reason this time decided I needed a new boys name. Brody I went off a few months ago as I started to think it was a bit too modern and didnt really go with Caitlin. Max or Noah were close contenders until 2 weeks ago when I remembered Josh and just thought why the hell dont I just use it... beats randall or bruce thats for sure!!! I did actually think of pm'ing you last week to say I hope you didnt mind if I did but then I thought that was a bit silly/hormonal of me
Mandy - I think you should have a joshua too - its a lovely name!

Mari - Bf not going so good Tried to BF during night twice last night but he just sucked for ages and it was starting to hurt. He was really unsettled when I took him off and I ended up giving him 2oz of formula and he fell asleep. Formula fed all day again today. Sort of feel like my milk coming in tonight so will try again tonight (MW said best time to stimulate milk is to BF in night, something to do with hormones and babys waking more often???) Im starting to panic but iv left it too late/am worrying too much about amounts etc. Anyway thats a whole other story, think il do a seperate post incase you dont see this or anyone else can advise.

Caitlin is ok with him. Wouldnt say she in love and wouldnt say she totally put out either. She seems a bit unsure of what to do when he crys and is keen for everyone else to have him but me eg 'Joshua wants daddy now' or 'joshua wants sit on nana's knee mummy'. She did 2nite when he was crying getting changed say that she didnt like the baby which made me a bit sad. Think she means she doesnt like the noise but. This morning we carried josh in holding a wee packet of fireman sam figures and told her he'd bought her a present for being such a good big sister. She beamed from ear to ear and kept saying 'fank you joshua' & 'joshua my fwiend'. I think she seriously believed he had popped out to b&m for an hr on his own She also trys to show him tv programs eg 'look joshua its show me show me now' So all in all not to bad but I do occasionally catch the odd look of uncertainty/scaredness in her eyes which makes me sad and she is quite keen to curl up beside me on sofa.

Joshua still quite sleepy but im not praising the lord just yet for giving me a well behaved baby just yet - I know quite often it can take 2-3 weeks for colic etc to rear its ugly head. Still havent pooped either Am eating weetabix and a pint of pure orange for supper with a big spoonful of lactulose and am prob in for hell 2moro morning, best to get it over with before MW comes on Fri and threatens to shove something up my bum but!!!!

congratulations its sounds like you did great, I had diamorphine and if I had my time over i would never take it again.

awww hun congrats

i had pethidine with rich and was promptly sick everywhere, and felt like i wasnt in control at all, plus he slept for hours too.

enjoy your little man xx